Intermingling between genders

[Bint e Aisha]

Following is taken from http://www.ummati.blogspot.com/

 

Intermingling of the sexes I

 

I begin in the name of Allah Most Gracious Most Merciful. 

The topic in discussion is one that will surely create some controversy amongst the minds of many. Some of you may read the first paragraph and decide you would like to read no further. Others may read the entire post and quietly dismiss what is said. However I place a small request before you: please do ponder upon what is said. Jazakallah. 

You may all agree that having a physical relationship with a non-mehram is totally forbidden in Islam. And if one was to trangress these boundaries then punishment would be the inevitable consequence. However, if one was to put it simply then we would agree that any form of communication that is likely to lead to ones carnal desires being aroused, is strictly forbidden. One does not know whether one's desires will be aroused or not- though there is always a possibility, hence such communication is forbidden. 

By communication I mean conversations between a non mehram man and a woman in person, or via the phone, even by a mere look and yes, let me utter the deadly words, the most common form of communication amongst non-mehrams is taking place on the internet. It is the most easiest form and sadly it is succeeding beyond measure in corrupting our minds and leading us astray. 

(Let me stress, this form of contact I am referring to is one that is keptunnecessarily, there are instances where non-mehrams can communicate, these shall me mentioned later on inshallah) 

One specific ploy used by people who want to make an excuse to chat to the opposite sex, is to refer to them as their 'brother' and 'sister.' Does this really convince you that what you are doing is islamically acceptable? Yes, every muslim is a brother and sister to one another, but these so called brothers and sisters of ours are people who we can marry, hence the ruling of it being forbidden. 

Neither does the excuse of being 'friends' work because such a thing as friends between a non-mehram man and a woman exist in Islam. 

I would like to end by asking, what do we derive from an hours long conversation or even merely keeping in contact with a guy/girl? Yes, it is a form of pass-time, or maybe we think it to be 'fun' and lastly, and most definitely we derive pleasure out of it. I ask you, what is our pleasure in comparison to that of the displeasure of Allah (swt)? What is our comfort in comparison to that of the discomfort and pain of the Blessed Prophet (saw)? 

Is it fair, that this very Prophet who experienced such hardhship and pain for the sake of his ummah to remain strong on his/her Imaan, so that Allah may grant his ummah salvation from hell, this very Prophet's teachings are being torn to shreads. Do we feel even the slightest bit of remorse? 

In conclusion I would like to say that this post is not directed at a specific individual, but rather to the entire ummah as a whole. I would like to apologize if I may have said anything that has caused any one of you readers to feel offended. This is not my attempt to be judgemental but rather I am placing a genuine concern before you, I pray that this entry creates an awareness of the evils of men and women chatting online. I pray that Allah gives me and all you readers the hidayah to practice upon what has been said. 

Jazakallah for reading. 

[Bint e Aisha]

Assalamualaykum readers.

In this post I will be continuing with my previous topic regarding the intermingling of non-mehram men and women that takes place in person as well as on the internet.

I was specifically targetting the 'chatting' that is taking place in todays age that has become the norm. We no longer consider it to be an evil but instead it seems to be encouraged.

However, there is a type of communication in Islam that is permitted. This is the contact between a non-mehram man and woman who communicate for the sake of Islam. But please note only in extreme cases of necessity. Those whose sole purpose is to gain knowledge for the betterment of their own imaan, as well as the entire ummah.
Truly, this can be seen taking place at the time of the Prophet (saw) and his blessed companions. The Mother of the Believers hazrat Aishah (ra) has related many hadiths to inform the ummah of the blessed ways of our Prophet(saw) These hadiths were asked by the noble companions of the Prophet (saw) upon which hazrat Aisha use to reply behind a screen in the most modest manner. Yes, indeed this is a perfect example that clearly shows such communication is permitted in Islam.

However, I ask you, what has become of us today? We use this very excuse of propagating Islam and instead misuse it to suit our desires. Yes, once in a while an Islamic issue may crop up but other times? Other times, readers we are involved in deep conversations be it MSN or any other way, we are involved in many hours of zina. What is the need in speaking to a non-mehram about personal issues, about petty issues which are simply not necessary.

Ofcorse one may say 'my intentions are pure' truly I do not doubt that for one moment. However, all would agree that Shaytan makes it a duty upon himself to convert these intentions to please him. Muslims are urged 'Believing men and women keep your gazes down' This shows that despite having pure intentions one can easily fall into the trap of shaytan, therefore even the slightest bit of temptation is prohibitted from the start. Before any thing even takes place. Id like to apply this same aspect to internet chatting. Readers do not even go near unnecessary chatting between non-mehrams on the internet for this is the path leading to zina. We are mere mortals, we can not always control our desires, it may begin as an 'islamic issue' but result in zina.

I would like to conclude by saying that yes you may find the views outlined in my entries very extreme. However as is often said 'the truth is bitter' An ill person has to undergo severe treatment and drink bad tasting medicine as a cure. Similarly this post is being put before you regardless of how bitter it sounds. I apologise for anything said that may have caused offence.

Jazakallah for reading