Being Gentle...like A Butterfly

[SAFAH]

Being Gentle...like a butterfly

 

 

The idea of being a stoned face, mysterious individual with a sense of firmness sounds appealing to some; when this type of character exudes from a person, a sense of dominance can emanate from within the heart. This eventually leads one to become ill mannered and arrogant which in turn changes a person into a prideful being. As a result, this firmness which seemed to be awe inspiring has now taken a person to the banks of Jahannam. It is for this reason that Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wasallam said, "Harshness does not exist in something except that it makes it repulsive. Indeed Allah is compassionate and He love compassion.”

 

 

Unfortunately, we live in very rough society; such an environment has almost nurtured us to be hostile naturally. I understood this perfectly when I recently went to Madinah. I had left the hotel to go to the Prophet’s salallahu alayhi wasallam Mosque for Iftar when a brother suddenly grabbed my arm 20 meters away from the mosque. I instantly took him to be a trouble maker but I soon realised he was actually calling me to sit and break my fast with him. I watched him and found his courteous behaviour to be ever so pleasant. I then began to question myself as to why I had been so firm with him. I realised that it was the society that I had come from which told me to be defensive and sceptical as opposed to being gentle and friendly.

 

The sunnah or Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wasallam teaches us differently. It teaches us to be gentle and soft to every living and lifeless thing. During the battle of Uhud, Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wasallam commanded the archers to remain on a hill close to the battle until the war was won. Due to a misunderstanding, they left their positions which resulted in the death of 70 companions. However, Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wasallam was not harsh to them, nor was he aggressive. Rather, he was understanding and sympathetic; he accepted their reasons and pardoned them. He himself states in one hadith, “Forgive right-acting people for their mistakes.” Such behaviour brought about the pleasure of Allah Ta’ala and He notably mentions in the Qur’an,

 

 

“It was a mercy of Allah that you were soft and gentle with them. If you were rude, harsh, hard hearted, then they would have fled away from you. Pardon them, seek forgiveness from Allah for them and in future, consult them in the matter”

Softness is truly a characteristic which we must inculcate into our life. However, this does not mean that we become naive. If we live in such a place where there is much trickery and deceit, then it is not an act of piety to be forbearing. On the other hand, this is foolishness as a person is asking to be hoaxed.

 

Being gentle should be within us naturally. When a person is gentle, it beautifies him as a person and also wins the heart of people. Rasulullah salalallahu alayhi wasallam said, “Softness does not exist in anything except that it beautifies it.” However, in order to bring this characteristic within ourselves, we must aim to become tolerant. A person can only learn to forgive and be soft to others once he has subdued his nafs to such an extent that he does not become angry at petty things. When a person is able to blow away his annoyance, signs of compassion may then prevail in him.

 

Showing kindness to animals is enough for Allah Ta’ala to forgive a person. Imam Bukhari rahimahullah relates a narration in which a person fed a thirsty, ailing dog water which cured him. As a result, Allah Ta’ala forgave his sins. On the other hand, the hadith that Imam Bukhari rahimahullah brings thereafter shows the state of a woman who treated her pet so poorly that it was completely malnourished. As a result of her hard heartedness, Allah Ta’ala entered her into the fire. If this is the case with regards to animals, then what can be said for humans and especially our Muslim brothers and sisters?

 

There are some misinformed people who try to use Hadhrat Umar radiallahu anhu as their justification to being harsh. Such people quite simply do not know who Hadhrat Umar radiallahu anhu was. He was a soft, loving, caring man who shed tears for the sake of this Ummah. Such people who claim that he was harsh and stern know very little of him. His firmness was to those who had disobeyed Allah Ta’ala and caused pain to the Muslimeen but besides that, he was merciful to the believers as well as the non believers. Many narrations can be put forth of his softness. Let it be remembered, that he was a person about whom people used to say prior to his acceptance of Islam, “There is more chance of Umar’s donkey accepting Islam!” However, his heart was thereafter nurtured by the one who has been titled as the Mercy to Mankind; surely then, such characteristics would have been found in him also. Finally, I conclude with the hadith:

 

"Whoever has been given his portion of compassion has been given his portion of good. Whoever is denied being given his portion of compassion has been denied his portion of good. Good character will be the weightiest thing in the believer's balance on the Day of Rising. Allah hates a coarse, foul-mouthed person."

 

May Allah Ta'ala bless us with such characteristics. Ameen.