ummtaalib

My Wife has taken Bayah from a shaikh. She is very crazy to learn Tasawwuf. Question My question is related to Bayah of a woman in Islam. My Wife has taken Bayah from a shaikh. She is very crazy to learn Tasawwuf. She says that to learn tasawwuf, I can meet my shaikh any time either in day or night and I shouldn’t have any obligation on it. She also says that if I will resist she can demand DIVORSE even. I know the Shaikh and I have also taken Bayah from him. I have discussed this issue with Shaikh and he says that if she wants to see me alone, I should not resist and he will allow my wife to do so according to shariah. I am very disturb and don’t know what to do. I am scared that if I say some hard words, our shaikh might angry on it. Answer In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh. The essence of Tasawwuf is Ihsaan, which means Allah consciousness. A person becomes ever conscious of the laws of Allah in every aspect of life. One can never achieve any heights in Tasawwuf while violating the laws of Allah. It is therefore important that the spiritual guide (Shaikh) himself strongly adheres to Shariah. If he violates the laws of Shariah, he cannot be an ideal role model for his followers. His guidance will lack spiritual light (ruhaniyyah). According to Shariah, a woman cannot be alone with a ghair-mahram male. Rasulullah Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, عَنِ ابْنِ عَبَّاسٍ، عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ ‏”‏ لاَ يَخْلُوَنَّ رَجُلٌ بِامْرَأَةٍ إِلاَّ مَعَ ذِي مَحْرَمٍ… ‏”‏‏ Ibn `Abbas Radhiallahu anhu narrates: The Prophet Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, “No man should stay with a woman in seclusion except in the presence of a Mahram…“ [sahih al-Bukhari 5233. Book 67, Hadith 166] The Shaikh is a ghair-mahram. Your wife cannot be alone with him. According to the above quoted Hadith, such a union is contaminated with the evils of Shaitan. How can one attain spiritual effulgence through such a meeting? In this era of moral degeneration, one should exercise extreme precaution. A mere curtain separating a ghair-mahram man and woman sitting alone too is not free from fitnah. If a woman wishes to receive spiritual guidance and general advice, in this age of technology, that is very easy. She could email her spiritual guide rather than seeing him alone. We have come across many incidents where Shaitan misled a ‘Shaikh’ with his female Mureeds. Furthermore, according to Shariah, the right of the husband precedes the right of the Shaikh. It is incorrect for the Shaikh to override the right of the husband and advise him against his will to let his wife see him. The wifes attitude of wanting divorce if she cannot see the Shaikh requires reformation. Her Shaikh should advise her that Allah said, …و قرن في بيوتكن ولا تبرجن تبرج الجاهلية الأولى… And stay in your houses, and do not display yourselves like that of the times of ignorance… [surah al-Ahzab:33] Her Shaikh should advise her to obey her husband and in obeying the laws of the Shariah, she will get close to Allah. If the Shaikh facilitates her un-Islamic demands, then he is also guilty of violating the laws of Allah. He cannot be a means of leading people close to Allah. He is actually distancing his followers from Allah. And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best Bilal Issak Student Darul Iftaa Leicester, England, UK Checked and Approved by, Mufti Ebrahim Desai. Source

British Deobandi view on Assimilation, Integration, Hatred, Extremism and Terrorism Mufti Amjad Mohammed

Pearls of Wisdom: No.50 “Food for the Soul” SUBJECT: BROTHERHOOD Allah, The Most Exalted, says: "The Believers are but a single Brotherhood." (Qur’an 49:10) The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) is reported to have said: "A Muslim is the brother of another Muslim. He does not oppress him, nor does he leave him at the mercy of others." (Hadith - Muslim) “Do not hate each other, do not envy each other, do not turn away from each other, but rather be servants of Allah as brothers. It is not lawful for a Muslim to boycott his brother for more than three days.”(Hadith–Bukhari ) Note: Brotherhood in Islam is a comprehensive concept that is based upon good character with others, treating others the way we want to be treated, and uniting together upon common values. It has three levels of degree: religion, family, and humanity. Each of these levels has a set of rights and duties that a Muslim must uphold with others. “The parable of the believers in their affection, mercy, and compassion for each other is that of a body. When any limb aches, the whole body reacts with sleeplessness and fever.” (Hadith Bukhari) www.eislam.co.za

Life of Junaid Jamshed by Mufti Abdur-Rahman ibn Yusuf Mufti Abdur-Rahman speaks on the inspirational life of brother Junaid Jamshed

Lifting the veil on the Niqaab debate Mufti Amjad Mohammad Lifting the Veil on the niqab.pdf

Keeping children indoors at Maghrib time Q: What is the ruling regarding taking infant children outside at the time of Maghrib? A: The Hadith teaches us that around the time of Maghrib children should be kept indoors. They should not be allowed to go outside as there are certain creations of Allah Ta'ala (e.g. Jinnaat and Shayaateen) that roam about at that time and may cause harm to the children. Therefore, in order to save the children from the harms of these creations, we are advised to keep them indoors. However, the Hadith also explains that when when a portion of the night passes, then the children may be allowed to go outside. And Allah Ta'ala (الله تعالى) knows best. عن ابن جريج أخبرني عطاء أنه سمع جابر بن عبد الله يقول قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم إذا كان جنح الليل أو أمسيتم فكفوا صبيانكم فإن الشيطان ينتشر حينئذ فإذا ذهب ساعة من الليل فخلوهم وأغلقوا الأبواب واذكروا اسم الله فإن الشيطان لا يفتح بابا مغلقا وأوكوا قربكم واذكروا اسم الله وخمروا آنيتكم واذكروا اسم الله ولو أن تعرضوا عليها شيئا وأطفؤا مصابيحكم (مسلم رقم 2012) جابر بن عبد الله رضي الله عنهما قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم إذا كان جنح الليل أو أمسيتم فكفوا صبيانكم فإن الشياطين تنتشر حينئذ فإذا ذهبت ساعة من الليل فخلوهم وأغلقوا الأبواب واذكروا اسم الله فإن الشيطان لا يفتح بابا مغلقا قال وأخبرني عمرو بن دينار سمع جابر بن عبد الله نحو ما أخبرني عطاء ولم يذكر واذكروا اسم الله (بخاري رقم 3304) عن جابر بن عبد الله رفعه قال واكفتوا صبيانكم عند العشاء وقال مسدد عند المساء فإن للجن انتشارا وخطفة (أبو داود رقم 3735) Answered by: Mufti Zakaria Makada Checked & Approved: Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

The Charitable Buyer How often have we purchased items from vendors on the streets and sidewalks? Some of us who do so, also have the habit of bargaining with these poor vendors. The following Hadith is a source of guidance and inspiration on this topic: A Profound Deed Sayyiduna Jabir (radiyallahu ‘anhu) reports that Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) had purchased a camel from me. Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) paid me the price, and gave me a little extra. As I departed, he (sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) called me back. I thought perhaps Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) was unhappy with the camel and wanted to return it. When I went to him, he said: ‘You may keep the money and the camel.’ (Sahih Bukhari, Hadith: 2097 and Sahih Muslim, Hadith: 3626) Morals 1. When paying our dues, it’s good to give a little extra too. 2. Sayyiduna Jabir (radiyallahu ‘anhu) had lots of overheads which included the expenses of his seven sisters as well. This was a way in which Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) offered his support to him. 3. Let us also revive this practice, especially when we are purchasing goods from poor vendors on the sidewalks. [on condition they are not exploiting foreign tourists!] Instead of bargaining with such people, who are in conditions of much need, we ought to be paying the full price. In some instances we should pay extra with the intention of charity. At least once in a while, pay the price, take the item and then return it without taking back the money either. See the joy that this blessed Sunnah of Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) brings to their faces. In fact, the doer too feels a sense of satisfaction in this. It could also be a means of attracting them to Islam. The sunnah of Rasulullah (sallallahu’alayhi wasallam) is always an attraction to Islam… Let us give it a try this holiday season. al-miftah

Diluting Zam-Zam with normal water Q. Does Zam-Zam remain Zam-Zam if it is diluted with normal water? A. By diluting Zam-Zam water with normal water, the blessings of Zam-Zam will not decrease but will remain the same. And Allah Ta’ala Knows Best Mufti Ismaeel Bassa Confirmation: Mufti Ebrahim Desai (Islamic rulings on this Q&A newsletter are answered in accordance to the Hanafi Fiqh) Fatwa Department Jamiatul Ulama (KZN) Council of Muslim Theologians

Mariam: Mother of Isa (AS) Maryam (Mary), the mother of Isa (Jesus), was a pious Muslim woman during the time of Prophet Zakariyya. She was Maryam daughter Imran from the family lineage of Dawud (David), the offspring of the Children of Israel. In the Quran there is a chapter named Maryam which talks about Maryam, her birth, her story, the birth of her son Prophet Isa (Jesus), and other things. Allah also mentioned the story of her mother's pregnancy with her in Surah Al Imran. Maryam's mother, Hannah, conceived and delivered Maryam when she was an old woman, at an age when women usually can no longer have babies. With the birth of a son in mind, Hannah vowed that she would dedicate the child to the service of the Sacred House in Jerusalem, dedicate the child for worship, freed from all worldly affairs. Instead Almighty Allah blessed Hannah with a daughter. She named the girl "Maryam," which literally means "maidservant of Allah," and she asked Allah to protect Maryam and her offspring from evil. Maryam could not be devoted to temple service as her mother had intended, due to being a female, under the Mosaic Law at the time. However, as the new born was marked out for a special destiny to be the mother of the miracle-child, Prophet Isa, Allah had accepted her for His service. The Holy Quran says: (Remember) when the wife of 'Imran said: "O my Lord! I have vowed to You what (the child that) is in my womb to be dedicated for Your services (free from all worldly work; to serve Your Place of worship), so accept this, from me. Verily, You are the All-Hearer, the All-Knowing." Then when she delivered her [child Maryam (Mary)], she said: "O my Lord! I have delivered a female child," - and Allah knew better what she delivered, - "And the male is not like the female, and I have named her Maryam, and I seek refuge with You (Allah) for her and for her offspring from Shaitan (Satan), the outcast." (Surah Al-Imran:35-36) Since Maryam's father had died, she lived under the care of Zakariyya, who was the husband of Maryam's sister and the father of John. He was a great man among Children of Israel at the time, to whom they would refer their religious matters. She grew up as a righteous, pure, and pious Muslim woman worshipping Allah and endeavoring greatly in performing obedience to Him. Zakariyya saw astonishing miracles occur from her that amazed him. So her Lord (Allah) accepted her with goodly acceptance. He made her grow in a good manner and put her under the care of Zachariyya. Every time he entered Al-Mihrâb (a praying place or a private room) to (visit) her, he found her supplied with sustenance. He said: "O Maryam! From where have you got this?" She said, "This is from Allah." Verily, Allah provides sustenance to whom He wills, without limit." (Surah Al-Imran:37) It has been mentioned that he would find her with winter fruit during the summer and summer fruit during the winter. She became the best of the women in the world. It is mentioned in the Quran that the angels said Allah chose Maryam and preferred her to the other women of the world. And (remember) when the angels said: "O Maryam (Mary)! Verily, Allah has chosen you, purified you, and chosen you above the women of the 'Alamîn (mankind and jinns)." O Maryam! "Submit yourself with obedience to your Lord (Allah, by worshipping none but Him Alone) and prostrate yourself, and Irkâ'i (bow down etc.) along with Ar-Râki'ûn (those who bow down etc.)." (Surah Al-Imran:42-43) And as the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, "Many men reached the level of perfection, but no woman reached such a level except Maryam, the daughter of Imran and Asia, the wife of Pharaoh." (Hadith - Sahih Bukhari 4.643, Narrated Abu Musa Al Ashari ) Maryam was unique in that she gave birth to a son by a special miracle, without the intervention of the customary physical means. This of course does not mean that she was more than human, any more than her son was more than human. When Allah wanted to grant her His servant and messenger, Isa (peace be upon him), Maryam withdrew from her family and secluded herself from them. She retired to the eastern side of the Sacred Mosque in Jerusalem where she prayed. It was in this state that the angel appeared to her in the shape of a man. As she thought the angel was a man, she was frightened and asked him not to invade her privacy: She withdrew in seclusion from her family to place facing east. (Surah Maryam:16) Then, Allah sent His Ruh, the angel Jibril (Gabriel), to her. And he appeared before he in the form of a man in all respects. (Surah Maryam:17) When the angel (Jibril) appeared to her in the form of a man, while she was in a place secluded by herself with a partition between her and her people, she was afraid of him and thought he wanted to rape her. Therefore, she said, Verily I seek refuge with the Most Gracious from you, if you do fear Allah. (Surah Maryam:18) She meant, "If you fear Allah," as a means of reminding him of Allah. This is what is legislated in defense against (evil), so that it may be repulsed with ease. Therefore, the first thing she did was try to make him fear Allah, the Mighty and Sublime. The angel said to her in response, and in order to remove the fear that she felt within herself, "I am not what you think, but I am a the messenger of your Lord." By this he meant, "Allah has sent me to you." [At-Tabari 18:164]. It is said that when she mentioned the Name of the Most Beneficent (Ar-Rahman), Jibril fell apart and returned to his true form as an angel. He responded, 'I am only a messenger from your Lord, to provide to you the gift of a righteous son.' (Surah Maryam:19) She said: "How can I have a son..." Maryam was amazed at this. How she could have a son when she did not have a husband nor did she commit wicked acts like fornication? For this reason she said, ...when no man has touched me, nor am I Baghiyya (unchaste)? (Surah Maryam:20) He said: "Thus said your Lord: 'That is easy from Me (Allah)..." (Surah Maryam:21) The angel responded to her "Verily, Allah has said that a boy will be born from you even though you do not have a husband and you have not committed any lewdness. Verily, he is the Most Able to do whatever He wills." Due to this, he (Jibril) conveyed Allah's Words, And (We wish) to appoint him as a sign to mankind (Surah Maryam:21) This means a proof and a sign for mankind of the power of their Maker and Creator, Who diversified them in their creation. He created their father, Adam, without a male or female. Then he created Hawwa (Eve, Adam's spouse) from a male (from the rib of Adam) without a female (mother). Then, He created the rest of their progeny from male and female, except Isa. He created Isa to be born from a female without a male. Thus, Allah completed the four types of creation of the human being, which proves the perfection of his power and the magnificence of His authority. There is no god worthy of worship except Him and there is no true Lord other than Him. Concerning Allah's statement: and a mercy from Us.. (Surah Maryam:21) This means, "we will make this boy a mercy from Allah and a Prophet from the Prophets. He will call to the worship of Allah and monotheistic belief in Him. This is as Allah, the Exalted, said in another Ayah, (Remember) when the angels said: "O Maryam! Verily, Allah gives you the good news of a Word from Him, his name will be Al-Masih, Isa (Jesus), the son of Maryam, held in honor in this world and in the Hereafter, and will be one of those who are near to Allah. And he will speak to the people, in the cradle and in manhood, and he will be one of the righteous. (Surah Al-Imran:45-46) Finally Jibril completes his dialogue with Maryam, informing her that this matter was preordained by Allah's power and will. and it is a matter (already decreed (by Allah). (Surah Maryam:21) This means that Allah determined to do this, so there is no avoiding it. [At Tabari 18:165] So she conceived him and she retired with him to a remote place. (Surah Maryam:22) Later, Maryam, being human, suffered the effects of childbirth as any expectant mother would during these times. And the pains of childbirth drove her to the trunk of a palm-tree: she cried (in her anguish): "Ah! would that I had died before this! Would that I had been a thing forgotten and out of sight!" But (a voice) cried to her from beneath the (palm-free): "Grieve not! for thy Lord hath provided a rivulet beneath thee; "And shake towards thyself the trunk of the palm-tree: it will let fall fresh ripe dates upon thee. "So eat and drink and cool (thine) eye. And if thou dost see any man say `I have vowed a fast to (Allah) Most Gracious and this day will I enter into no talk with any human being.' " (Surah Maryam:23-26) When Mary showed the baby to her people, they said that this was truly an amazing thing that had happened. The newly born baby (Jesus) replied to the people: He said: "I am indeed a servant of Allah: He hath given me revelation and made me a prophet; "And He hath made me Blessed wheresoever I be and hath enjoined on me Prayer and Charity as long as I live; "(He) hath made me kind to my mother and not overbearing or miserable; "So Peace is on me the day I was born the day that I die and the Day that I shall be raised up to life (again)"! (Surah Maryam:30-33) And that is what is reported of the story of Maryam. Even though Maryam is the mother of Isa (Jesus) and occupies a highest position among women, neither Maryam nor Isa have any divine attributes in them. The Holy Quran makes this clear in the following verse: They do blaspheme who say: "Allah is Christ the son of Maryam." But said Christ: "O children of Israel! worship Allah my Lord and your Lord." Whoever joins other gods with Allah, Allah will forbid him the garden and the Fire will be his abode. There will for the wrong-doers be no one to help. They do blaspheme who say: Allah is one of three in a Trinity: for there is no god except One Allah. If they desist not from their word (of blasphemy) verily a grievous penalty will befall the blasphemers among them. Why turn they not to Allah and seek His forgiveness? For Allah is Oft-forgiving Most Merciful. Christ the son of Maryam was no more than an Apostle; many were the Apostles that passed away before him. His mother was a woman of truth. They had both to eat their (daily) food. See how Allah doth makes His Signs clear to them; yet see in what ways they are deluded away from the truth! Say: Will ye worship besides Allah something which hath no power either to harm or benefit you? But Allah He it is that heareth and knoweth all things." Say: "O people of the Book! exceed not in your religion the bounds (of what is proper) trespassing beyond the truth nor follow the vain desires of people who went wrong in times gone by who misled many and strayed (themselves) from the even way. (Surah Al-Ma'idah:72-77) Say: He is Allah the One and Only; Allah the Eternal Absolute; He begetteth not nor is He begotten; And there is none like unto Him. (Surah Al-Ikhlas) Source: Taken (with Thanks) from MuslimAccess.com www.central-mosque.com

Maryam, Mother of 'Isaa As Maryam (Mary), the mother of Isa (Jesus), was a pious Muslim woman during the time of Prophet Zakariyya. She was Maryam daughter Imran from the family lineage of Dawud (David), the offspring of the Children of Israel. In the Quran there is a chapter named Maryam which talks about Maryam, her birth, her story, the birth of her son Prophet Isa (Jesus), and other things. Special sustenance provided for Maryam Every time Zakariyyah AS entered Al-Mihrâb (a praying place or a private room) to (visit) her, he found her supplied with sustenance. He said: "O Maryam! From where have you got this?" She said, "This is from Allah." Verily, Allah provides sustenance to whom He wills, without limit." (Surah Al-Imran:37) It has been mentioned that he would find her with winter fruit during the summer and summer fruit during the winter. Maryam the Chosen Woman She became the best of the women in the world. It is mentioned in the Quran that the angels said Allah chose Maryam and preferred her to the other women of the world. And (remember) when the angels said: "O Maryam (Mary)! Verily, Allah has chosen you, purified you, and chosen you above the women of the 'Alamîn (mankind and jinns)." O Maryam! "Submit yourself with obedience to your Lord (Allah, by worshipping none but Him Alone) and prostrate yourself, and Irkâ'i (bow down etc.) along with Ar-Râki'ûn (those who bow down etc.)." (Surah Al-Imran:42-43) At the time of giving birth Maryam, being human, suffered the effects of childbirth as any expectant mother would during these times. And the pains of childbirth drove her to the trunk of a palm-tree: she cried (in her anguish): "Ah! would that I had died before this! Would that I had been a thing forgotten and out of sight!" But (a voice) cried to her from beneath the (palm-free): "Grieve not! for thy Lord hath provided a rivulet beneath thee; "And shake towards thyself the trunk of the palm-tree: it will let fall fresh ripe dates upon thee. "So eat and drink and cool (thine) eye. And if thou dost see any man say `I have vowed a fast to (Allah) Most Gracious and this day will I enter into no talk with any human being.' " (Surah Maryam:23-26) Read Biography Here

BY SHAYKH AMER JAMIL PHYSICAL ABUSE The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) never hit any of his wives. Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her) narrates the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) never hit any of his wives norany of his servants (Muslim). PHYSICAL ABUSE The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) never hit any of his wives. Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her) narrates the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) never hit any of his wives nor any of his servants (Muslim). The one instance in the life of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) where there was serious marital disagreement he moved away from them for a period of one month and offered them the choice to accept his manner of living and remain his wives or to release them from the marriage and to separate gracefully. (see Quran 33:28-29) Such was the Prophet’s (peace and blessings be upon him) hatred of violence against women that when he heard that some of his companions (may Allah be pleased with them) had beaten their wives, he said to them in a scolding manner “How can one of you beat “How can one of you beat his wife like the beating of a slave, and then lie with her his wife like the beating of a slave, and then lie with her in the evening?” (Bukhari) Read more........... reminder_3_domestic_abuse_as_printed.pdf

Abu Ishaq al-Shirazi: No need to discuss the reliability of Imams like Abu Hanifa AbuIshaq al-Shirazi: No need to discuss the reliability of Imams like Abu Hanifa وجملته أن الراوي لا يخلو إما أن يكون معلوم العدالة أو معلوم الفسق أو مجهول الحال، فإن كانت عدالته معلومة كالصحابة رضي الله عنهم أو أفاضل التابعين كالحسن وعطاء والشعبي والنخعي وأجلاء الأئمة كمالك وسفيان وأبي حنيفة والشافعي وأحمد وإسحاق ومن يجري مجراهم وجب قبول خبره ولم يجب البحث عن عدالته “To summarize; a narrator is either known for his reliability or for his being unsound or else he will be unknown. If his reliability is known as is the case of the Companions, or greatest of the Successors (tabi’un) like Hasan (al-Basri), ‘Ata, al-Sha’bi, al-Nakha’i, and most exalted of the Imams like Malik, Sufyan (al-Thawri), Abu Hanifa, al-Shafi’i, Ahmad, Ishaq and those like them, it is imperative to accept their reports and discussion about their trustworthiness is not required.” (Abu Ishaq al-Shirazi, Al-Luma’ fi Usool al-Fiqh, Dar al-Kotob al-Ilmiya, Beirut, 2003 p.77) Who was Abu Ishaq al-Shirazi? الشيخ، الإمام، القدوة، المجتهد، شيخ الإسلام، أبو إسحاق إبراهيم بن علي بن يوسف الفيروزآبادي، الشيرازي، الشافعي، نزيل بغداد، قيل: لقبه جمال الدين مولده: في سنة ثلاث وتسعين وثلاث مائة قال أبو بكر الشاشي: أبو إسحاق حجة الله على أئمة العصر وقال الموفق الحنفي: أبو إسحاق أمير المؤمنين في الفقهاء “The Shaykh, the Imam, the exemplar, the Mujtahid, Shaykh al-Islam, Abu Ishaq Ibrahim bin Yusuf al-Ferozabadi, al-Shirazi, al-Shafi’i, resident of Baghdad. His surname was Jamal ad-Deen. He was born in 393 A.H. … Abu Bakr al-Shashi said: ‘Abu Ishaq is Allah’s proof on the leading scholars of the time.’ al-Mofaq al-Hanafi said, ‘Abu Ishaq is the Leader of the Faithful from among the fuqaha.’” (al-Dhahabi, Siyar al-A’lam al-Nubala, al-Resalah publications, Beirut, 1985 vol.18 pp.452-455) Yahya Ja’far darultahqiq

Question Are DexShell Socks permitted for doing masah in Wudu? https://www.meccabooks.com/703-wudu-moza-khuffs-socks-warm-weather.html?search_query=khuffs&results=2 Answer In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh. The Daruliftaa recently examined and physically tested four different Dexshell socks namely: Dexshell UltraLite, Dexshell Coolvent Lite, Dexshell Wudu and Dexshell Coolvent. The Daruliftaa deems them (the four above mentioned) fit to be used for masah during wudu. Attached below for your convenience is the official fatwa issued by the Daruliftaa regarding Dexshell socks. And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best Ismail Dawoodjee Student Darul Iftaa Zambia Checked and Approved by, Mufti Ebrahim Desai. www.daruliftaa.net Email/Reference Header: [email protected] Daruliftaa.net Shortened Question: Masah on Dexshell Socks Question: Dear Respected Mufti Hazraat, I am including samples of Dexshell socks for your examination to validate if Masah on these socks is permissible. There are four samples, one for each model that we sell. We request your analysis for each sample. 1) The thinnest of all is the Dexshell UltraLite. We do not sell these for wudu purpose as we are sceptical regarding their validity for wudu. 2) Then there is Dexshell Coolvent Lite. These are our most popular socks. 3) The latest model is Dexshell Wudhu. The manufacturer has started making this model due to demand specifically for wudu socks. They are starting to become popular among retailers because they are specifically marketed and labelled for wudu. 4) The thickest model of the samples sent s the Dexshell Coolvent. These are less popular due to higher rating causing more heat in the feet and toes. Overall, Dexshell’s quality durability and waterproof features far exceed that of Sealskinz. They are a superior product by which the patented lamination technology processes make the triple layer go unnoticed. We look forward to your response. More information on the products is available at www.dexshell.com If there are any questions or if any explanation is necessary, please contact me at +1-631-988-3200 or by email at [email protected] Was Salam Fahad Tirmizi Wudu Gear Inc. Answer: In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh. For the permissibility of making Masah (wiping) on non-leather socks, it is imperative that the socks fulfil all the conditions that are necessary for making Masah (wiping) on leather socks. After thoroughly studying the inherent qualities of leather socks, our illustrious Fuqāhā’ have suggested that non-leather socks should resemble leather socks in the following: They should cover both the ankles entirely. They should be durable enough that a person can walk with the sock for three miles without them tearing. Both socks should be independently free from holes to the extent of three small toes. The socks should remain on the leg without being tied or fastened. They should be such that water does not seep through them.[1] We have examined and physically tested the four models of the Dexshell socks referred to in the question. After conducting a durability test on them by walking the necessary three Shar’ī miles, as well as conducting a water resistance test and a test to ascertain whether the socks are able to stand on the legs without being fastened or tied, we are satisfied with the results and deem them to bit fit for Masah during Wudhu. Hence, it is permissible to use them as alternatives to leather socks. And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best Nabeel Valli, AbdulMannan Nizami, Asim Patel Students Darul Iftaa Zambia, USA, South Africa Checked and Approved by, Mufti Ebrahim Desai. www.daruliftaa.net [1] المحيط البرهاني في الفقه النعماني (1/ 344) [المجلس العلمي] وإن كان ثخيناً مستمسكاً ويستر الكعب ستراً لا يراه الناظر كما هو جوارب أهل مرو، فعلى قول أبي حنيفة رحمه الله: لا يجوز المسح عليه، إلا إذا كان منعلاً أو مبطناً، وعلى قولهما: يجوز. الفتاوى الهندية (1/ 32) [إمدادية] وَالثَّخِينِ الذي ليس مُجَلَّدًا وَلَا مُنَعَّلًا بِشَرْطِ أَنْ يَسْتَمْسِكَ على السَّاقِ بِلَا رَبْطٍ وَلَا يُرَى ما تَحْتَهُ وَعَلَيْهِ الْفَتْوَى كَذَا في النَّهْرِ الْفَائِقِ الدر المختار وحاشية ابن عابدين (رد المحتار) (1/ 269) [أيج ايم سعيد] قال الحصكفي: (الثخينين) بحيث يمشي فرسخا ويثبت على الساق ولا يرى ما تحته ولا يشف إلا أن ينفذ إلى الخف قدر الغرض. قال ابن عابدين: (قوله على الثخينين) أي اللذين ليسا مجلدين ولا منعلين نهر، وهذا التقييد مستفاد من عطف ما بعده عليه، وبه يعلم أنه نعت للجوربين فقط كما هو صريح عبارة الكنز.

يَا رَبِّ صَلِّ وَ سَلِّم دَائِمًا أَبَدًا عَلَى حَبِيبِكَ خَيرِ الخَلْقِ كُلِّهِمِ

The Fiqh and Wisdom of observing ʻIddah By Mufti ʻAbd al-Qādir Ḥusayn In the dictionary the word Iddah means counting in terms of quantity. But for all intents and purposes Iddah in the context of when a husband has divorced his wife or when a husband has passed on – according to the jurists and fuqaha – will mean the lady has to observe Iddah. The waiting period until the counting period ends. The Iddah for a divorced lady: Whenever clarity on any issue is sought, the first point of reference is the Noble Quran. All Mighty Allah SWT states: the ladies who have been divorced will wait with themselves for three qurooh. Because the Arabic language is so unique and rich, certain words have two opposite meanings. In the Hanafi and Hanbali madhabs, when the husband divorces his wife by giving one or two or three talaqs, the Iddah will be the duration of three menses. So the ideal situation will be for the husband to divorce his wife in the period of cleanliness and in that period he has not fulfilled the conjugal rights with his wife, he issues the talaq either verbally or in writing. After the third menses ends, the Iddah has concluded. However another meaning of qurooh is tuhur which means cleanliness theretofore according to the Maliki and Shafi madhabs three periods of cleanliness have to pass. That is if a husband gave his wife talaq during her period of cleanliness, her Iddah begins, counting that period as the first period of cleanliness. Once the third period of cleanliness ends, the Iddah has concluded. The reason for differences of opinion in verdict between the different schools of thought is because Arabic words have different meanings and to understand this text and context need to be looked at. Another interesting issue connected to this: a husband has married his wife but he has not gone into Khalwah (privacy) with her and they have not consummated their marriage, and just after the nikah they have a heated argument in the presence of some people and the husband issues talaq. All Mighty Allah has addressed this issue also, “O you who believe! When you marry believing women, and then divorce them before you have sexual intercourse with them, no iddah (divorce prescribed period) have you to count in respect of them. So give them a present, and set them free (i.e. divorce), in a handsome manner.” (Al-Ahzab-49) Immediately after the divorce the woman is able to marry another man. It is important to note that even if the marriage was not consummate but the married couple were alone, in privacy together, and then Iddah becomes necessary. The Iddah for a lady who is pregnant and given talaq: Whenever a lady is pregnant and the husband passes away or the husband issues a talaq or a fasakh takes place then: When the husband passes away – the woman becomes a widow. When the husband issues a talaq – the woman becomes a divorcee. When fasakh takes place – fasakh means that the husband is oppressing the wife, and he does not maintain and sustain her, give her food, shelter, clothing, and he wants her to work, he could be assaulting her, and he refuses to divorce her because of ignorance and arrogance, the woman seeks assistance from Ulama or other scholars, a court case is held, he is found guilty and the marriage is annulled. In all these cases –once the woman gives birth, irrespective of the time from which either death of the husband takes place, divorce was issued or annulment given, her Iddah expires. Iddah for a widow: There are three different scenarios in the case when a woman’s husband passes away. The Quraan Kareem addresses this issue and says that it is a period of four months and ten days. Example if a woman’s husband passes away on the 28th Rabbi ul Awwal or February 1, the counting of 130 days will begin from the day of death on either the Gregorian or Islamic calendar. However the fuqaha and jurists note: if a woman’s husband passes away on the beginning of the Islamic lunar month, the first of any of these months, in these cases one will take into consideration the months and the days Islamically. For example if the death occurred on Ramadaan 1, then Ramadaan, Shawwaal, Dhul Qadah and Dhul Hijjah and ten days of Muharram form part of the Iddah period. After the 10th of Muharram the Iddah is then complete. Therefore months and days are taken into consideration when death occurs on the first of an Islamic lunar month. If the husband passes away and the wife is pregnant Iddah expires after the woman gives birth, irrespective of the time left for birth to take place. The rationale behind Iddah Many people want to know why islam has “imposed” Iddah on the lady and not the man. There is no Iddah upon men. When a man’s wife passes away he doesn’t have a waiting period. There are multiple reasons why a woman has to sit in Iddah when her husband passes away or when she is divorced. When the wife has been divorced, it might be the first talaq or the second, there is still room for reconciliation and reconciliation is the best. The Quran encourages the husband, “take back your wife but with equity and justice,” not to cause her harm. The first rationale is that if one or two talaqs have only been given the marriage can still be salvaged. During the Iddah differences can be resolved and there is room for reconciliation to take place. In the Iddah a new nikah does not need to be performed. The two people are still able to reconcile after the Iddah has expired but a new nikah then has to be performed, this is after one or two talaqs have been given. Sometimes it occurs that after a woman’s husband passes away or she has been divorced that she learns she is pregnant. A woman must first deliver her baby as she cannot before she can enter a marriage with a man while carrying another man’s child. Islam says this institution of marriage is so sacrosanct that it is in this world and will continue in the year after. The dichotomy is that while specific people in this world perform the nikah, there Allah SWT performs the nikah. To maintain and retain the sanctity of nikah, Allah says that when nikah takes place Iddah must take place when it ends. It proves that marriage is not a play thing, where one can be married to different people at any time. Being able to enter and leave a marriage at any time undermines the sanctity and importance of marriage. When a woman’s husband passes away or she has been given a divorce, it is the husband’s right upon the woman that she sits in Iddah. When she wants to resettle she will need time and not be caught on the rebound and manipulated to enter another marriage during a moment of difficulty. Rules of Iddah: The rules differ slightly in different cases: When a husband gives his wife one or two revocable divorces, according to all scholars, the husband has to provide his wife with shelter, food and clothing. The woman has to stay in the house of her husband after the first or second talaq. She should adorn or beautify herself and try to rebuild the marriage. There is room for reconciliation. When a husband gives his wife three talaqs, the Iddah will be according to the three qurooh as explained above. According to the Hanafi madhab, the husband has to provide the woman with shelter and food etc. The Shafi madhab states the husband has to only provide the woman with shelter and nothing else in this case. In the Hanbali madhab the husband does not have to provide the wife with either of these, shelter or maintenance during the Iddah. During her Iddah the woman is not able to adorn herself, and it must be looked at as a sad time because a marriage has just been totally broken. There is no room for reconciliation because three talaqs have been issued. Going out to work during Iddah: If the husband issues the talaq there is no need for the woman to work when the husband is responsible. Islamically she must be aware that the husband is responsible for maintenance during the Iddah period. After the Iddah has expired the husband is no longer responsible for maintenance. When a woman’s husband passes away, the inheritance a woman receives should maintain and sustain her or the woman’s children (sons) should be responsible. The affluent community is able to provide the woman with zakaah during her Iddah period. There are isolated cases when a woman is given permission to work during the Iddah period but in most circumstances permission is not given for the woman to work during the Iddah period because there are other alternatives. If a woman does not observe Iddah correctly either after divorce or after death then she is guilty of a major sin. All the loopholes used to try and justify are unacceptable and regarded as feeble excuses. If a woman marries someone while she is in Iddah either after divorce or after death, the nikah is null and void and is unaccepted, according to all four madhabs . The man and woman are regarded as living in sin. If a husband issues a diivorce, a suitor is able to approach the woman who has been issued the divorce – through his mother or sisters etc – and speak about marriage implicitly and not in a direct manner. ciibroadcasting.com

Be a Mirror to Other Believers Submitted by Mohammed Desai on The Hadith states, المؤمن مراٰة المومن A Mu’min is a mirror unto another Mu’min When a person looks into the mirror, it informs him of all his faults. It reflects the dirt that is on the face, in the nose, in the beard, etc. but the mirror doesn’t tell another of these faults. This is exactly how a Mu’min should behave with a fellow Mu’min. We act contrary to this, on finding a fault with a person we inform the entire world but the person, thus he is never notified about the problem. A person possessing Imaani brotherhood will inform his Muslim brother if he happens to detect some fault within him, and the brother that is corrected should thank the person that informed him. Alhamdulillah, this quality is found in our students at the Madrasah that lead the Salaah or call out the Adhaan. Whenever, we find some error in their Salaah or Adhaan, we inform them in a manner that does not offend them and they respond by saying ‘Jazakallahu Khairan.’ If they are not corrected they will continue with their habit through their lives. Another quality of the mirror, it does not exaggerate things. It informs you of things exactly as they are. If a person asks another, “How was my Bayaan, he will say, it was presented extremely well without any errors.” There were errors that he is aware of, but he downplays it or exaggerates it, whereas this is not the quality of a mirror. This is how a Mu’min should be. When we go for I.D. photos, the picture of the person photographed remains on the screen even after taking the photo. We have to then request them to remove the image particularly if the photo of a woman was taken. The mirror never retains the image and fault of another, but the moment the person moves, the image disappears. A Mu’min also doesn’t tell others that the person before you had various faults in him. A true Mu’min should delete and conceal faults of others as a mirror does. If we know of a fault in a person, we should attempt to built a relationship with him, even though it takes months and thereafter correct him in a kind manner, once he gains your trust and confidence. Bhai Abdul Wahhab Saheb D.B. says, “If someone is of a senior position and you are unable to correct him, then appoint a senior person to correct him. Hadrat Ali R.A. requested permission from Rasulullah Salallahu Alaihi Wasallam to invite his father Abu Talib towards Islam. Rasulullah Salallahu Alaihi Wasallam didn’t permit him as the Dawat of a child won’t hold such importance in the gaze of seniors. When conveying a message, we should choose an appropriate person to convey the message. Nowadays, we open people’s issues and problems before everyone, but we never confront the person involved in the wrong so that he may rectify himself. We should also do the right thing in the correct manner, not in the incorrect manner. Someone stole the horse of a particular person. He was informed that so and so is the thief and has the horse in his yard. He jumped the wall of the thief at night and took his horse. The actual thief now reported him to the police for trespassing and stealing. This teaches us that the right thing must be done in the right way, not in the wrong way. He should have contacted the police first, provided proof that the horse belonged to him and get back his horse. In conclusion, don’t expose the faults of people, rather correct their mistakes in a kind and compassionate manner. Khanqah Akhtari

Fiqh GR4 Lesson 10.pdf

The Power of the Pen Ever since man existed, so too did his pen exist. With the passage of time, the only thing that changed was the form and mechanism of this pen. The fact that this tool of knowledge has stood the test of time is proof of its power. One should never underestimate the impact of the written word. Even in an era like ours, where there are so many innovative ways of capturing knowledge, there is nothing that matches the written word. Some narrations encourage the use of the pen with the following words: ‘Capture knowledge by writing it.’ (Refer: Majma’uz Zawaid, Hadith: 684-686) For the Flag bearers of Islam As flag bearers of Islam, every ‘alim is entrusted with two basic responsibilities; The propagation of the knowledge of Islam. The defense of Islam. Just as the above duties can be fulfilled with the tongue, so too can they be achieved with the pen. Each mode has its benefits. Throughout time, the illustrious scholars of Islam have continuously fulfilled the above duties. It is due to their writings that many are recognised, and highly regarded up to this day; centuries after their demise. Varied Capabilities Allah Ta’ala has created each man differently. For many, He has made it easy to use their tongues in fulfilling the above responsibility, while others find it easier to use their pens, and for some Allah Ta’ala combines the best of both! As students of Islam, we should always aspire for the ideal. Therefore, we are encouraged to utilise both; our tongues as well as our pens for propagating Din. It is through the pen, that we can fashion the generations that will follow. If we give up the pen, we are effectively giving up on the next generation! Unfortunately many have the inculcated the ‘copy and paste trend’. This will weaken our ability to produce our own writings and speeches. We will never know the actual power of our pens, until we give it our first try! Note: The above is an effort to inspire qualified bearers of knowledge to utilise their skill. This should not be used to justify the writings/speeches of the unqualified! al-miftah

Muhammad sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam Our Beloved Nabī Indeed, there is a beautiful example for you in the Messenger of Allāh... (33:21) One of the greatest gifts we can give our children is to help them develop love and appreciation for the life of the Messenger of Allāh ta‘ālā. Studying the exemplary sīrah of our beloved Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam is a source of many blessings, one of which is the fostering of good morals and character. A sound knowledge of sīrah is also essential to truly understand Islām and to convey it to others. In this booklet the renowned Islamic scholar and spiritual mentor, Shaykh-ul-Hadīth Shaykh Mawlānā Muhammad Saleem Dhorat hafizahullāh, presents a brief account of the life of our beloved Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam. Primarily aimed at children, it can also serve as an introduction to sīrah for people of all ages. To order your copy, please email [email protected] for details. Madrasahs, schools, Islamic societies etc. wishing to purchase in large quantity, may email [email protected] or call 0116 262 5440.

A Simple Yet Effective Solution To Our Current Problems By Hadrat Mawlānā Muhammad Saleem Dhorat hafizahullāh In the period before the advent of our beloved Messenger sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam, the whole world was engulfed in the darkness of ignorance. Humans were uncivilised, morally decadent and devoid of good character. When Allāh ta‘ālā sent the Leader of all the Ambiyā ‘alayhimus salām and the Seal of the Messengers ‘alayhimus salām, Muhammad Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam, the entire world was illuminated. By following his example and teachings people of all backgrounds and creeds, Muslim and non-Muslim alike, have achieved great successes throughout the ensuing fourteen centuries. The underlying reason behind success in following his example is that Allāh ta‘ālā created His beloved Rasūl sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam the best in every way. Whenever the Sahābah radhiyallāhu ‘anhum described a particular characteristic of his, they would always qualify it with the superlative it deserved. They described him, for example, as the most generous, the most knowledgeable, the most courageous etc. Their descriptions proclaim quite clearly to all who followed his era that in every praiseworthy trait Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam was ‘The Best’. Even objective non-Muslims, have had no option but to praise the Messenger of Islām sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam. George Bernard Shaw writes: I have studied him – the wonderful man and in my opinion far from being an anti-Christ, he must be called the Saviour of humanity. (The Genuine Islam, Vol 1 No8, 1936) Pandit Gyanandra Dev Sharma Shastri, at a meeting in Gurakhpur, India (1928) said: They (Muhammad’s critics) see fire instead of light, ugliness instead of good. They distort and present every good quality as a great vice. It reflects their own depravity… The critics are blind. They cannot see that the only ‘sword’ Muhammad wielded was the sword of Mercy, Compassion, Friendship, and Forgiveness – the sword that conquers enemies and purifies their hearts. His sword was sharper than the sword of steel. Lamartine said: Philosopher, orator, apostle, legislator, warrior, conqueror of ideas, restorer of rational doctrines, of a religion without images; the founder of twenty terrestrial empires and of one spiritual empire, that is Muhammad. As regards all standards by which human greatness may be measured, we may well ask, is there any man greater than he? (Histoire de la Turquie, Vol II, Paris, 1854) A critic, David Samuel Margoliouth, an Oxford University Professor of the early 20th century, wrote a biography of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam. He writes in his preface: The biographers of the Prophet Mohammed form a long series which it is impossible to end, but in which it would be honourable to find a place. (Margoliouth, Mohammed and the Rise of Islam, 1905) When Gandhi read the sīrah of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam in two volumes, he commented: When I closed the second volume I was sorry there was not more for me to read of that great life. (Gandhi, Young India, 1924) T he sīrah (life or biography) of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam is full of lessons. It is an ocean that has no shore, meaning the sīrah is never-ending when it comes to deriving lessons from it. It is from the miracles of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam that his life has been recorded and preserved in such detail. All credit goes to his beloved Companions radhiyallāhu ‘anhum who recorded this beautiful life with great care and detail to the extent that his humorous statements have also been preserved, and have proven to be an ocean of knowledge. Let us study an example: Anas ibn Mālik radhiyallāhu ‘anhu narrates how Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam would try cheering up his younger brother by saying a little rhyme: O Father of ‘Umayr! What has happened to the nughayr (a type of bird)? (Al-Bukhārī) The small child would be delighted at the rhyme and by the fact that Allāh’s Messenger would call him, a mere toddler, Father of ‘Umayr! This is one small and seemingly insignificant episode from the life of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam, but the ‘Ulamā having pondered over this statement of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam were able to deduce over sixty religious precepts from it. Such is the power and depth of a single humorous statement, what can one say about his formal and serious statements! The blessed sīrah is truly a light and full of guidance for all circumstances and situations we may encounter in life. Allāh ta‘ālā says: Indeed, there is a beautiful example for you in the Messenger of Allāh... (33:21) The life and teachings of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam are truly comprehensive that a day will never come when the Muslims will not be able to find a solution through them to any issue they encounter. Guidance can be found in his teachings on every subject matter. And if we follow these beautiful teachings, we will become successful in both worlds. So we need to emulate the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam in all aspects of our lives: ‘aqā’id (beliefs), ‘ibādāt (acts of worship), mu‘āmalāt (dealings and transactions), mu‘āsharāt (social conduct) and akhlāq hasanah (good character). It is unfortunate that many of us have confined Dīn to the first two branches, ‘aqā’id and ‘ibādāt, only. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has warned of destruction for such people. Once Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam asked his Sahābah: ‘Who is a poor person?’ They replied, ‘A poor person amongst us is he who has neither dirham nor wealth.’ Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said, ‘The poor person in my Ummah will be one who will come on the Day of Judgement with his salāh, sawm and zakāh; however, he swore at someone, accused someone, unlawfully consumed the wealth of someone, killed someone and hurt someone, then his good deeds will be given to his victims. And if his good deeds are exhausted but the compensation of his victims remain, then their sins will be taken and entered in his account and he will be thrown in the hell-fire.’ (Muslim) In addition to protecting our good deeds, the practice of mu‘āmalāt, mu‘āsharāt and akhlāq hasanah presents the beauty of our Dīn to the whole of humanity, as they predominantly relate to social interaction. The life of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam and of those who followed him to the highest degree, contain numerous episodes of winning the hearts of people, through practically demonstrating these branches of Dīn. If we strive to make our lives fully in accordance with the teachings of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam and emulate him in every way, then we will become the beloved of Allāh ta‘ālā. Say [O Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam], ‘If you really love Allāh, then follow me, and Allāh will love you and forgive you your sins. Allāh is Most-Forgiving, Very-Merciful.’ (3:31) Once we become His beloved, we will automatically become the beloved of His entire creation. The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has said: When Allāh ta‘ālā makes a servant His beloved, then Allāh ta‘ālā summons Jibra’īl ‘alayhis salām and says, ‘Indeed, Allāh ta‘ālā loves such a person; you too love him.’ When Jibra’īl ‘alayhis salām hears this command of Allāh ta‘ālā, his heart is infused with love for this person. Such a person is now the beloved of Allāh ta‘ālā and Jibra’īl ‘alayhis salām. Then, Allāh ta‘ālā commands Jibra’īl ‘alayhis salām to address the dwellers of the heavens and say; Indeed, Allāh ta‘ālā loves such a person; you too love him. Upon hearing the command, their hearts too are infused with his love. Then this person is granted acceptance amongst the people on the earth [resulting in everyone entertaining love for him]. (Al-Bukhārī) This is a simple solution to the problems that are blighting the entire world at the moment; in fact, this is the only solution. As Muslims, we should endeavour to adopt the way of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam in every facet of our lives. Our ‘aqā’id (beliefs), ‘ibādāt (acts of worship), mu‘āmalāt (dealings and transactions), mu‘āsharāt (social conduct) and akhlāq hasanah (good character) should all be like that of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam. If we desire that the people of the world look at us with love and respect, then we need to resolve to live our lives according to the way of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam so that we become the beloved of Allāh ta‘ālā and as a result become the beloved of the entire creation. Let us resolve today, assess/review our lives and rectify any shortcomings. When our actions completely reflect the teachings of the beloved of Allāh ta‘ālā, then spiritual blessings will become apparent which will resolve all our issues of this world and the Hereafter. This is a very pertinent matter at the current time and needs our utmost attention. If we make a firm resolution to learn the way of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam and act upon it accordingly - whether the action is fard, wājib, sunnah or mustahabb - then success awaits. © Riyādul Jannah (Vol. 24 No. 1, Jan 2015)

This is a nasheed in Urdu Words of a nasheed sung by Junaid Jamshed ra which was in essence a du'a, have been changed into a du'a for him asking Allah subhaanahu wata'ala to accept his efforts and forgive him

His message was something different. He wanted us to live a life that Allah had prescribed. He wanted us to model ourselves after our Beloved Prophet (saw). Remembering Junaid Jamshed... Aatir Abdul Rauf | Facebook I feel alone today. I don't know how to express the sadness inside me. Words don't seem enough to me. But that's all I have. I guess words will have to do. The shock waves of the news regarding the plane that took lives of 40 are far from settled. I’m in denial. The nation stands speechless as it lost its voice. A voice that carried us through one generation to another, weaving through every segment of society, through times of distress and times of joy. I don't know why I feel this sad. It's strange. I don't know how to explain it. I didn't have intimate ties with Junaid. I didn't know him personally well enough. He wasn't related to me in any way. But why do I still feel a piece of me was ripped out of me without warning? It hurts. It really, really does. I thought I had it under control. I was going to be a man about this. But every time I heard the news throughout the day, it would hurt a little more. My heart would sink deeper. My heart would flinch. My body would cringe. I knew something was wrong. My heart was trying to tell me something but I decided to ignore it. I didn't want to give to its desires. Death happens, right? It's the universal constant. Finally, when I got up for Isha prayers, I understood what my heart was asking me to do. It just wanted me to shed my tears alone. I cried hiding my tears in the water of the wudu that I had chosen not to dry off. And I cried hard. I don't know why. I didn't even know Junaid Jamshed that well. But why does it seem like I lost a lifelong companion that I've taken for granted for so long? I tried remembering Junaid Jamshed in my memories. I personally met Junaid Jamshed for the first time at Hajj back in 2011. My brother and I were planning for our first pilgrimage and had enrolled in the Hajj group that JJ sponsors. The experience was nothing short of amazing. Every person managing the logistics was intensely committed to serve the members of the group and it was a reflection of what Junaid Jamshed stood for. Maulana Tariq Jameel and Junaid Jamshed were travelling with the group and would often grant the group time after each prayer. Maulana Tariq would share words of impeccable wisdom, while Junaid did what he did best. He would move hearts by presenting us a collection of thoughtful nasheeds that left us mesmerized. To hear them in person was something different. Why? Because he didn't just perform nasheeds for the sake of it. Up close, you could see how he put his entire existence behind every word he uttered. He packed it with heavy emotions. He meant every word he said. And most importantly, he made you feel the same way. At Mina, after he had talked to swarms of fans at our camp, my brother and I took the opportunity to sit with Junaid keen to hear something inspirational from him. He didn't say much as he was clearly exhausted with the various conversations he had been having for hours. Few hours later, right before my brother and I were about to perform the ritual of "stoning the devil", Junaid made his way through the crowds and called out to us. We turned around and Junaid stood in front of us, told us how he didn't know what to say earlier but felt like he owed us some advice. He told us how momentous this occasion of Hajj was and we should take it as an opportunity to change for the better moving forward. Truth is, he didn't owe us a single thing. But he wanted to give back. And he always did - at all levels. That was the sincerity of this man. Later on in Mecca, my brother and I got lucky as our hotel room was on the same floor as both Junaid Jamshed and Maulana Tariq Jameel. We would often say salaam while crossing paths in the elevator down to offer the prayers at the Haram. It felt great to see his smiling face and greet him with his firm, warm handshake. But that interaction is not the basis of why I'm sad. I'm sure that's not the reason. My perception of Junaid Jamshed was not made through those interactions at Hajj. Something else was bothering me. He represented something larger than that. He was an immortal constant in many people’s lives. He was there in my childhood as he swept the nation with patriotic tunes that rivaled the national anthem. His voice was there in my teen years as I grappled with the challenges of adolescence. He was there when I had to look up to someone when I wanted to transform my personal life to be closer to Islam. He was there when I had to share examples of how it's not impossible to change no matter what your circumstances are. He was there when I needed to listen to a voice that would heighten my spirit and melt my heart. I lost that "constant" yesterday. It's like losing a limb that you never thought you would live without. Even if it's a tiny finger, the whole body hurts uncontrollably. It's a sick feeling. But it's also a grim reminder. We go on and on and on planning our lives. We try to project our future and think about where we want to be in 5 or 7 or 10 years. We talk about Career Growth. We talk about savings. But it's events like these that abruptly ground us to the reality of how transient this life really is. We don't even know whether we will last another breath. I sometimes get so consumed about my future that I forget about making the present right. I forget about reflecting on my past. It reminds me of this profound Ayah: The question to ask is “Are we prepared to return to Him right now?”. No one has received a ticket to live a certain number of years. There is no guarantee. Every soul edges closer to his/her eventual demise every second. And we have no idea whether that day is a week away, years away or just moments away. Are we satisfied with the state of the relations we keep? Do we need to apologize to someone? Do we need to tell someone how much we love them? I just realized that there are no second chances. I might as well do it now. Yes. Now. Our society for long has remained polarized in terms of beliefs and lifestyle. You will find free-thinking liberals and traditional conservatives living in the same neighborhood. The chasm between the two ends is a difficult one to bridge. And if anyone did manage to cross that bridge and win acceptance on both sides, it was Junaid Jamshed. In the 90's, JJ rose to fame and Vital Signs was hailed as pioneers of the Pakistan's pop world. He touched the lives of his peers and thrilled fans all around the world. He became the national expression of Pakistanis and was thought to be synonymous to patriotism. He set the country ablaze with inspiration time and again. He had won hearts of millions. When he took the turn towards religion and launched his first Nasheed album in 2005, he reached out to a different audience that he had not connected with before: the significant other half. Lots of people were skeptical at first. He was ridiculed and he was trolled. But that didn't stop "Jalwa-e-Jana", "Medina Medina", "Dil Badal De" and "Haram kee Muqaddas Hawaoon" from hitting a sensitive chord that we didn't even know existed. He went out to preach Islam, sometimes to decrepit far-flung locations, calling one person at a time. He sacrificed the glamour he had worked so hard to garner and submitted to a task that he believed was his ultimate raison d'etre. Slowly and steadily, his actions spoke louder than words, and devout Muslims all over the country dropped their suspicious guard and finally accepted him. He had won their hearts as well. He had done the unthinkable. He had crossed the chasm and won at both ends. But what's amazing to me is that despite him switching his focus, he still retained the respect of his colleagues and friends of yesteryear. He didn't abandon them. He didn’t just turn his back on them as if he didn't know them. He continued to cherish those relationships and only strengthen those bonds. He called upon his old friends to work with him on the path of Allah. And he reciprocated by giving them company to share old time memories. And that's what he symbolized: unity. That's what made the nation breathe. He was the glue between the broken pieces of Pakistan's puzzle. And now that that glue is gone, I'm feeling like I've lost part of my identity. He was left bankrupt after he gave up his music life. But he had staunch conviction that Allah would not let his sacrifice go unrewarded. He launched his clothing line and within the space of years, it skyrocketed to immense success. The business grew unimaginably quickly and etched Junaid's name on the slate of entrepreneurial stardom. He led the way to show how leading a life for Islam doesn't mean you can't be successful professionally. Those two things are not antithetical to each other. He showed that "Maulvis" aren't starving anywhere or living off pitiful donations. My personal journey in life left me conflicted and JJ seemed to be an sub-conscious source of inspiration. Leading a fairly liberal life in my childhood/teens, I found myself gravitating to the message of simplicity of Islam in my late 20s. I felt torn between two different forces. The transition to leading a more conservative life was not easy. And I looked up to Junaid Jamshed in that respect. He showed me that you don't need to think of it as a suffering, but rather a blessing. You don't need to burn bridges, but that this opportunity was to build new ones. His story told me that my transformative experience was not an end, rather it was just the beginning. As Mosharraf Zaidi mentioned in his tweet, he truly was the quintessential Pakistani: "Junaid Jamshed's journey was so quintessentially Pakistani. Conflicted, passionate, devoted, ubersmart, and so, so talented. Tragic loss." I've been pacing around my house since yesterday. It hurts. My heart aches. My eyes tear up. Why do I feel so much sorrow? Am I over-reacting? I'm confused. I feel alone. I felt for his children. Losing your parents completely crushes you. But losing your parents to an unthinkable tragedy like this delivers unbearable shock that no mortal can handle. It's like someone ripping out your heart through your throat. My wife told me that it reminded her of when she lost both her parents during 2005's earthquake in the Margalla Tower collapse. The ground had escaped her when she saw the fallen tower on her way back from college. She was left shattered, alone, hopeless, confused, abandoned. The world had gone pitch dark. There were no second chances. There were no goodbyes exchanged. There was no last "I love you". There was no time to apologize for the hurt caused to them. There was no closure. To this day, she feels wounded. I hugged my little one a little tighter today. While he played around with his toys, I felt terribly odd how an innocent little child like him had no idea how grim the realities of life can be. I wanted him to retain that innocence and prayed that Allah protect us from every tragedy. I've stopped following the news. I can't bear when somebody puts up his nasheed now. My heart swells with sadness when I know that I won't be hearing that voice again. But when I see what's being aired about him, I ask myself. Is that how he wanted us to remember him? His message was something different. He wanted us to live a life that Allah had prescribed. He wanted us to model ourselves after our Beloved Prophet (saw). People were quick in pointing out the gravity of the mistakes he made during his sermons last year. I see that. But I also see a man who begged for forgiveness. To the entire nation. How many of us are willing to go through that? In a world full of unapologetic, pompous liars, JJ set a different standard. We make mistakes every day in our private lives. We say the most vile things to one another. We don't have people chasing us because we don't have cameras pointing at us to record the deed. Yet we have the audacity to continue to shame a person who has already sincerely apologized to us with. We didn't leave the matter for Allah to decide. We should learn from this. JJ left with a clean heart, whereas we still carry perpetual grudges and hate in ours. His message was of unity. In one of his tweets he mentioned how it was better to lose the argument and win the person. That's what defined him. It wasn't about money, fame or glamour. It was about the joy of being together on the path of eternal prosperity. He didn't want to just succeed himself. He wanted everyone to win. JJ left a legacy that cannot be replaced. May Allah be raazi with you, Junaid Jamshed, and with every passenger on that unfortunate plane. May Allah forgive them all. I also congratulate you, Junaid Jamshed, for securing a place among the ranks of shuhadah (martyrs). It’s not an easy feat to achieve in this era. In some ways, it feels that this is the appropriate rank that Allah wanted to grant you after all the adversities you faced. Your life was like a person trying to wake up a dear friend from deep sleep. You kept jolting us with your voice. You kept reminding us with your words. You were patient with us while we enjoyed our slumber and when we’d push you away calling you names. We would, at times, wake up for a bit but then we’d go back to sleep. But then this happened. You chose to lay a proverbial mic drop on us. The sound of which was so loud that it rocked us to our core. And now we’re wide awake. But you’re no longer there. Well played. Junaid Jamshed, you gave us love and didn't expect anything back. You taught me how to never give up. I wish we had time to say goodbye. But that is the Will of Allah, the Magnificent, the Master of all Worlds, the Merciful and Beneficient. To Him we belong. To Him we shall return. Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi rajeoon. InshaAllah, we all hope to meet you in Jannah, Junaid Jamshed. Perhaps you will grant us another opportunity to listen to one of your nasheeds there. Every soul shall taste death....The question to ask is “Are we prepared to return to Him right now?”

In light of recent events highlighting domestic violence in our ummah, there is an unspoken casualty in the war of domestic violence. Abusive spouses may also be abusive parents. Furthermore, an abused spouse may in turn lash out and abuse the children from all the built up frustration and anger within the marriage. This is is how it was in my home. The bad beginning Although pictures speak a thousand words, our family photos never spoke the truth of what went on behind closed doors. Our house had been built with sturdy walls, but our home lacked a true and strong foundation of love. Both of my parents immigrated to the United States and, like most immigrants, brought along their cultural baggage and mindset. Although I will never know objectively how their marriage was in the beginning, according to my mother my father was verbally and physically abusive towards her. Growing up, I watched my parents fight with such passion and intensity that I am surprised, but thankful, that neither of them killed the other (although my mother did threaten my father with various sharp objects during some of their disputes). Nasty words were tossed back and forth like a tennis match, each one trying to beat the other at the vicious game. Sometimes my siblings and I would stand up for our mother, resulting in our father telling us to shut up and stay out of it, even retaliating against us. My parents' disputes could and would start over anything and everything, although money and invalidating of feelings were two strong sparks. My mother believed divorce was not an option because she could not work and support all of us herself. My father did divorce my mother once in a fit of anger, but then asked for her back. He told me he loved my mother and would never want to divorce her as this would break our family apart. Despite the illusion that our family is together, it is broken. This was the marriage upon which our family was built. Children were brought into this environment because, like many people, my parents never questioned their ability to be good role models nor pondered the responsibility that came with having kids. In fact, it's a rite of passage – school, marriage and then children – and there is no question or deviation from this. As you might imagine, it was not a nurturing nor loving atmosphere to grow up in. Before we were old enough to understand or defend ourselves, we were thrown into the battlefield and became targets of violence and psychological warfare Faces behind the masks People are often shocked when they learn about a domestic violence case, when they discover a person's true nature and their hidden actions within the confines of their house. The truth is, looks can be deceiving and there is no way to distinguish someone who is abusive from one who is not by their outward appearance. Usually, the only ones who know the real faces behind the masks are those being abused and anyone the victims choose to tell. There are no tell-tale signs of abusive parents, dysfunctional families or “victims” of abuse. My parents are practicing Muslims who frequent Islamic events and outwardly show their devotion to Islam. My father prays Jumuah and both Fajr and Isha in the masjid. My mother watches religious programs, wears hijab, goes to Umrah whenever she can and is well known and well loved in our community. Our family spends Eid together, goes out to dinner together and even laughs together. We visit other families and other families visit us. None of us children are anti-social deviants; we all have friends and are active participants in society. We are all highly educated, having all graduated from college and some of us graduate school. While outwardly we all seemed “normal”, as is typical of dysfunctional families, each on of us children had our “adapted roles”. Mine was that of the lost child, the one who stayed out of trouble and was mostly overlooked and ignored. Unlike my siblings who rebelled in their own ways and at different times of their lives, I remained a “straight-edge” Muslim. I never drank, smoked, did drugs, had friends of the opposite gender or premarital relationships. I earned good grades, never hung out with “the wrong crowd and, even if I argued it, I never stayed out past my curfew. As hard as I tried to be good, I was never good enough. My parents treated me differently based on their moods. My father's emotions vacillated between extreme highs (happiness, giddiness, etc) and extreme lows (seclusion, aggression, verbal abuse). He was never big on words of love or kindness, and the primary way he supported us was financially. He never really talked to us except to blame us for something or to insult us. When he was in a jovial mood, he would smile, sing and encouraged me to smile and be happy. To show how fluctuating his mood was, one time he hit me so hard and so many times with a slipper, it broke. Almost immediately after this, he joked that I would now have to buy him a new one. There were at least three times that his violence left marks on my face, leaving me to face the public with signs of his rage. If I was asked about what happened, I fabricated something about hurting myself. My mother scared me that from ever telling the truth, saying that the police would come arrest my father and take us away, creating a scandal in our family. I was also too ashamed to admit to anyone, even my closest friends, that my father physically abused me; I wanted to be a normal child with normal parents, not a victim to be pitied. While my father was a raging bull, my mother was a wolf in sheep's clothing, hiding her abuse amidst kindness and affection. She was the “savior” against my father and had a very generous, sweet and giving demeanor when she was in a proper mood. I will not deny that she did many wonderful things for me and in fact, when she was nice, it was great to be with her. But, in a Jekyll/Hyde or Bruce Banner/Hulk fashion, when she unleashed her anger, it was explosive rage. Although she never hit me, I was a figurative punching bag on which she used insults, humiliation and expressions of anger instead of kicks and punches. Despite “keeping my nose clean”, my mother still found reasons to unleash her anger at me. One day, after spending time with a known and trusted friend, I came home to hear my mother telling my father how I was trying to be rebellious like my siblings. It was between 10:30 and 11:00 pm, a time which I had come home before without any repercussions and for someone in their late 20's, was not an “unGodly time” to come home at. When she heard me coming, she burst out of the front door without her hijab on, screaming at me that I was no longer her child, disowning me until the Day of Judgment and that she would put this in writing and send it to several Shuyukh. She also locked the door and told my father not to let me in. Even if I was out doing evil things, I didn't deserve that. No one does. Because this was my mother and because this behavior was common and accepted in our family and my parents' culture, I didn't see just how abnormal this was. Actions like these were always excused with “She was mad because…” or “Well you shouldn't/should have done…”. I felt too hurt, hated and even partly responsible for her actions to be able to see how abusive she was. I felt that if if somehow, if I had been a better child, she wouldn't have done or said that. I now see I could not control her behavior, only she could. It was traumatic to see her behave in such a way and hurt to be the target of such horrible comments, and this is only one example of her pain-inducing words and actions. She teetered between kind and caring woman to a cruel and vicious woman. She would praise my siblings and I to her friends one minute and then say how she wished she would die so she wouldn't see our faces again, that death was better for her than life with us. I couldn't tell if she loved or hated me, if I was good or bad. I cannot explain to you the confusion or the pain that I went through, only that I am glad I finally see the truth for what it is. Like other abusers, my parents wanted to exert their control over us. They yelled at me for being sad and for having individuality. Having autonomy was not allowed and success was simultaneously encouraged and deflated (sometimes by the same parent). My mother wanted us do to everything her way – from how we looked, how we dressed, what majors we chose, who we married, even what we named our children – and criticized us incessantly when we didn't follow. My father tried to “straighten us out” through physical and verbal assaults when we spoke up for ourselves or didn't do things exactly as he wanted. Imams and Shuyukh of Sunday school, Islamic lectures and Friday khutbahs told me constantly that parents deserved our utmost respect and unyielding obedience. And because they had heard the same lectures, my parents demanded this as well. It is a fact of life that children, more or less, emulate their parents' behavior. Thus, through their actions, my parents taught me how to be defiant, angry, hateful, spiteful, resentful, disrespectful and aggressive, and simultaneously punished me for expressing these emotions and behaviors. This created a tug of war in my head, between wishing that someone would say I had the right to be treated kindly and believing that I was being rightfully punished for being a bad child. No one ever spoke of children's rights or obligations of parents, so it was the latter that always won. The ill effects of abuse Growing up with abusive parents took a heavy and serious toll on me. From my childhood and even until now, the abuse has affected me in several facets of my life, mentally, physically and spiritually. I suffered from low self-esteem and had problems in my health and relationships, even with Allah. The abuse has affected my family as well – emotional problems, jealousy and spitefulness between siblings and emotionally incestuous relationships between parent and child developed – although they still choose to deny it. Effects on… …self-esteem and self-perception In my ignorance and in response to the turmoil, I experienced extreme self-loathing and hated my life growing up. Parents are said to be a mirror of their children, and since my parents had plenty of negative things to say, I could only see myself as a terrible person. How could I love myself when my own parents, the people who brought me into this world and who were supposed to love me unconditionally, did not? Even if they told me they loved me (which they did not), they didn't know how to show me they loved me. I felt hated as my father chased me in order to physically punish me and pointed out all my faults. My mother told me often how I was just like my father, whom I knew she carried a great disdain for. She grouped us both along with one of my siblings in the “bad guys” category. I felt there was something truly wrong with me, that I was just an awful person who didn't deserve to be loved. I wanted to disappear from the world thinking that maybe, just maybe, if I was gone, someone would miss me and want me back…then I would finally feel loved and wanted. I felt like a burden on my family who would be better off without me. I hated being me which anyone reading this might understand how that could be. Only Allah heard me as I apologized for being such a bad child. …relationship with the family I wanted Allah to love me, I wanted to obey Him by being kind to and obeying my parents. Despite the fact that my father physically and verbally abused me, I still tried to be good to him. But, thanks in part to my mother's comments about him, at some point in my life, my innocent childish love for my father changed to hate. I despised every single thing about him – how he ate, how he walked, how he talked. I hated that he still asked for and expected hugs and kisses from me even after the mean things he said and did to me. My mother perpetuated this idea in the way she fought with him; it always looked like he was the aggressor and she the victim. The well-known hadith that one's mother is more deserving of love and respect than one's father encouraged me to put all my energy into loving and obeying her as best I could. Because she was the one who comforted me after my father attacked me and defended me against him, standing up for me, she was the only source of comfort for me. Thus, I attached myself in an unhealthy manner to her and we became enmeshed; when she was happy I was happy and when she was mad or sad, I couldn't have a good time. I tried with all my power to make her happy and to make her pleased with me. It was because of this intense codependency that I have such a challenge in healing from her infliction; I gave her my all and she rejected, depreciated and destroyed it. The dysfunction permeated beyond our parents' relationships with each other or with me. My siblings and I have an uneasy relationship with each other that is affected, one way or another, by one or both parents. For example, one sibling cut ties with the other because of issues the other had with our mother. Another still believes our father to be a good father and pushes me to do things such as wish him a happy birthday or take him out for Father's Day. One sibling and I butted heads because they labeled me the abuser, claiming my mother's harshness and nonacceptance of my good deeds was in response to my antagonism. …relationship with Allah Because our relationship was borne out of blood and mentioned several times in the Qur'an, one of the favorite weapons that my mother used to validate her stance was religion. Similar to how abusive men misuse verses from the Qur'an, my mother misused the verses regarding treatment of parents, telling me how Allah would punish me and that if she were to die displeased with me I would be damned to Hell for all eternity. I was told several times that I had no iman in my heart, that I only do things out of fear of Allah's punishment and that if I were a true mu'min, I would not be so rude with my parents. When bad things would happen to me, she told me that Allah was angry with me and punished me for what I had done. I believed it. While we all doubt whether we are good enough in the sight of Allah, whether our deeds will be accepted or whether we are sincere, my mother spiritually abused me so intensely that I doubted if Allah even loved me. I thought “How could Allah love someone like me, someone who was so insolent and hated by their parents?” I asked Allah to forgive me for being such an insolent person and for being so bad to my parents. Today, I acknowledge that this was projection of her own feelings of herself, but the pain of hearing that come from my mother was extreme. …relationship with the community The shame and guilt I felt affected not only my relationship with myself and my Lord, but how I was with the community. For one, I felt as if I was wearing a scarlet letter “V” for being a victim of domestic violence. Although no one knew, I felt I was different and that no one would understand what I was going through. Other people had seemingly good relationships with their parents and had parents who were apparently loving and kind. I did not know for sure if this was true, but no one talked about it and neither did I. I felt isolated in my community. I didn't have anyone to talk to and didn't know if anyone cared or would even believe me about what was going on in my house if I told them. With my parents being such upstanding members of the community, it would be hard to convince someone that they were actually unkind and unfit parents. Another issue was the hypocrisy I felt. I was an outwardly practicing Muslim who went to MSA meetings, and treated people with as much kindness as I could. People enjoyed my company and liked me. But as I looked into the mirror that was my parents' eyes, I believed this was only because no one, except my parents, knew the real me. In fact, my mother told me that I was so nice to the people outside my house while being so ill-mannered to those in my home. At the time, I didn't believe she would say something that wasn't true, especially something so hurtful. Like most children, I thought the best of her and the worst of myself and with the community loving her as well, I took her guilty verdict to heart. …on marriage As abused children grow older, they too may choose to marry and have children of their own. No one will deny that when you marry someone, you marry their family. When you marry their family, you also marry their problems and toxicity. When these issues are not addressed or acknowledged, they cannot be resolved. They seep into the core of the marriage, into the hearts of the individuals. It affects how they deal with each other and ultimately how they deal with their children. People joke about the “evil in-laws” and make the same comments about treating them with kindness, respect and humility. When the in-laws are abusive and have a skewed view of reality, it is no joke. To avoid disclosing any identifiable details, I will not speak of my own or my siblings' marriages, but will instead refer to a couple that I know who live in an abusive home. The mother/mother-in-law behaves in a similar fashion to my mother, leading me to believe that she also has a mental illness. The husband (her son) believes that to be a good son, he must do anything and everything in his power to please his mother, even though nothing he ever does is good enough in her eyes. She, too, uses Islam's emphasis on serving parents as a means to get her way. She speaks nastily to both her son and daughter-in-law, both of whom feel the detrimental effects of living with an unstable and abusive person. Both are victims of abuse and do their utmost to please their perpetrator. For example, after a day of cleaning the house in hopes of pleasing her, she made a comment about how dirty the TV was, saying how she would never have kept her house in this shape. Even though the wife recognizes the abusive behavior of her mother-in-law, she does not know what to do or how to act. Her husband believes his mother needs to be obeyed and feels powerless to say or do anything to stand up for himself or his family. There are young children in this marriage who will, unless something changes, grow up seeing their parents treated harshly and possibly be treated in a similar manner themselves. This article was written anonymously and submitted through Salma Elkadi Abugideiri, a Licensed Professional Counselor Taken from muslimmatters.org

“The child is a tape recorder, a computer, a camera ... It will play back whatever it records. So give the child the best in upbringing.” - Hazrat Maulana Yunus Patel Saheb (Rahmatullahi ‘alayh)

Embalming And Moving A Body After Death Hanafi Fiqh > Qibla.com Answered by Shaykh Abdurrahman ibn Yusuf Mangera My grandmother is very ill and we’re considering options for her burial. She wants to be buried in New York (her plot is there), but she’s currently in another state that’s far away from there. In order to get her back to NY, in the case of her death she has to be embalmed by law. What is the ruling on this situation? Answer: Assalamu alaykum In the name of Allah the Inspirer of truth There are a number of problems linked with burying a person so far away. Firstly it is considered extremely disliked (makruh tahrimi) to transfer a deceased person from one area to another for burial unless it is just a mile or two (Radd al-Muhtar 1:602, 5:275) [AR. or further to the closest Muslim graveyard]. This is the opinion related from Imam Muhammad al-Shaybani and highlighted by Ibn Nujaym, Ibn ‘Abidin, Tahtawi, and others. Second, transferring the body causes unnecessary delay in the burial process which has been advised against in the hadiths. Thereafter, the process of embalming is problematic in Islam for a number of reasons. One is that it requires some incisions to be made on the body of the deceased (which is considered disrespectful) and the removal of the blood from it, replacing it with a formaldehyde based fluid. The embalming fluid is traditionally made from formaldehyde (5 to 29 percent), methanol, ethanol (9 to 56) and other solvents. Hence, the fluid is made up of impure substances which go with the deceased into the grave. Islamic law instructs us to purify the deceased by bathing it, perfuming it, and shrouding it in white, etc. To conclude, it is severely disliked to transport her over a mile or two and the embalming is unlawful. However, if she is in a condition to travel then there would be no problem with having her transferred to New York while she is alive. And Allah knows best. Wassalam Abdurrahman ibn Yusuf