ummtaalib

Anger – The True Enemy? Contrary to popular sentiment, anger is not the bad guy. Like all emotions, anger is the body’s way of getting our attention when we feel threatened or endangered, both literally and hypothetically. Trying to rid ourselves of anger is a losing game, not the least of which because of the fact that anger cannot be destroyed. We’ve all heard the hadith from Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alayhi wa Sallam on how a strong man controls his anger, as well as his admonitions to just avoid getting angry at all. True as it is, we suggest, however, that the issue of anger is far deeper than just avoidance. We know, as a matter of fact, that Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alayhi wa Sallam himself was angry sometimes , most often when he saw injustice being committed. In his book “The Forty Foundations of Religion”, Imam Al-Ghazali says about anger: “Breaking the power of anger is among the most important aspects of religion…By “breaking it”, I do not intend “removing it”, for indeed its root does not disappear…” One cannot defeat an enemy without knowing full well the identity of that enemy. Anger is not our enemy, any more than sadness, happiness, or love are enemies to us. Anger is merely a tool at our disposal, and like any tool it can be used mindfully or mindlessly. The true enemy is our inability to accept our reality and embrace all the parts of ourselves so that we may move forward into change, whole human beings. Learning to Respect Anger In a commentary on Imam Al-Ghazali’s aforementioned book, the author says, “Anger is like a hunting dog that does not oppose the hunter who trained it. Anger is led, like a hunting dog, by the intellect and sacred law, abiding by their guidance. This is only possible after a great deal of spiritual struggle against the self and becoming habituated to forbearance and resisting those things that cause anger.” Taken in this light, we can see that our anger serves us, so long as we do not allow our anger to control us. Al-Ghazali cautioned, however, against trying to remove anger from oneself entirely: “…if it disappears, it is necessary to obtain it, because it is…a preventer of bad deeds, and a multiplier of good deeds.” There are many situations in life which call for anger, including righting a wrong committed, ensuring justice is delivered in a court of law, and protecting the rights of orphans and widows, to name a few. There are some instances, however, where anger must simply be ignored, and in these instances, responding to one’s anger will only make matters worse. The correct response, according to Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alayhi wa Sallam is to seek refuge in Allah from Shaytan for Shaytan loves to stoke the fire of anger and to make wudu. He also said we should sit down if we feel angry while standing, and lie down if we still feel angry while sitting. (Sunan Abi Dawud 4782) Anger, however, does serve a purpose in some circumstances, but before one can determine if showing one’s anger is beneficial to the matter at hand, one must look under the anger at the deeper emotions. What Lies Beneath When we pull back the layers of anger, we will find that there are numerous other feelings just lying in wait, including guilt, shame, hurt, loss, longing, hunger, helplessness, anxiety, unworthiness, and emptiness. Ask yourself: “Am I angry because I’m actually afraid?” Or maybe you’re angry because you feel devastated? Maybe you feel angry because you feel dishonored or ashamed of yourself. In these circumstances, it is your nafs pushing you to respond. Aside from calmly expressing your feelings, the best reaction is no reaction at all, except the aforementioned recommendations of Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alayhi wa Sallam. Jalaladdin Rumi said, “ When you see the face of anger, look behind it and you will see the face of pride. Bring anger and pride under your feet, turn them into a ladder and climb higher. There is no peace until you become their master. Let go of anger, it may taste sweet but it kills. Don’t become its victim. You need humility to climb to freedom.” However, if your anger is coming from a place of worry for the well-being of another who is oppressed, or the concern for your own valid rights (your pride is not a right), there are ways to train yourself to express your anger in a healthy manner. http://jamiat.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Anger-management.jpg Controlling and using anger to our advantage There are two main routes to controlling one’s anger: knowledge and action. First and foremost, we must understand that under all our emotions, far below the surface of the anger lies denial of the qadr (destiny) of Allah . Al-Ghazali says: “There is no cause for your anger except the denial that a thing occurs by the will of Allah rather than by your own will…the anger of Allah upon you is greater than your own anger, and the grace of Allah is greater…” Having come to terms with the deepest root cause of our anger, the next step is action, both for the acute anger at hand the chronic underlying issue. First, as stated previously, sit down or lie down, seek refuge in Allah (say “authu billahi min ashshaytan arrajeem ”), and make wudu. When you are in a clear state of mind to consider better alternatives to acting in anger, you can more fully consider the consequences of your actions. Dealing with chronic anger, however, requires a life more devoted to restraint in general. This can be obtained through frequent sunnah fasting, and limiting one’s intake of too much food, too much leisure, and too much halal sexual pleasure. Too much of any good thing is bad. There are times, however, when one’s anger become so powerful, and the emotions underneath so muddled, that we need help from an outside source , and it is our responsibility to seek that help . Allah gave us a broad range of emotions so that we could experience life on this earth to its full potential, both the pleasure and the pain, the sadness and the joy. Let us not make one of those emotions a scapegoat so that we do not allow ourselves the full depth of experience Allah has created us to feel. Let sadness wash over you, as sadness does. Allow joy to warm you and leave you peacefully. Accept grief and the gifts it brings to your life. Anger is the hard shell of the egg that is your deeper, connected self. Crack that shell and life becomes vivid in all its colours and forms. May Almighty Allah protect us from Shaytaan and keep us with the Sunnah of holy prophet peace be upon him Source

“Anger is the energy that people use in order to act. But when you are angry, you are not lucid, and you might do wrong things” ~Thich Nhat Hanh. Dr. Nafisa Sekandari and Sr. Hosai Mojaddidi Anger, as an emotion, is a primary, natural, and mature emotion experienced by all humans at times, and has functional value for survival. Anger alerts our body to take corrective action when we or someone we care about have felt wronged or mistreated. Although anger as an emotion is normal, it’s what we do with this emotion that can lead to destructive actions. Uncontrolled anger can have a negative affect on our physical, mental, and social well-being. “Anger is never without a reason, but seldom with a good one”. ~Benjamin Franklin Anger is oftentimes a cover for deeper, underlying emotions such as fear and loss of control. We may feel justified when we are angry and feel we know the source of our anger but oftentimes, it’s less about the other person and more about our perceptions. Personal perception plays a big role in eliciting anger. If a person perceives to lose control of a situation, they might get angry despite what the reality of the situation might be. We often notice when we are happy, a similar situation may not stir the emotion of anger inside of us as when we are irritated, feeling down on ourselves, etc. “When anger rises, think of the consequences” ~Confucius Although anger can at times be constructive, most times it clouds our judgment and creates stress in our lives. If anger leads to aggressive behavior toward others, it can lead to permanent harm to personal relationships. Prolonged or excessive anger, deep resentment, and even mild anger has been linked to cardiovascular problems and heart attacks. “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned”. ~Buddha We must learn to pay attention to our anger and explore the underlying emotions related to it such as hurt or fear. Learning to feel empathy for others and taking the perspective of others is often helpful as well. For example when driving and experiencing road rage, you can view what might possibly be going on with the other driver. If you view the driver as ignorant and lacking proper driving skills, you might become enraged but if you view the driver as being sick or elderly, you might not be so quick to lose your temper. How often have you made mistakes on the road that you did not intent to? Maybe drove a little too slow while answering your phone or slowed down to hand something to your child in the back seat. We can imagine the person in front of us making such unintended mistakes as well and therefore not be so harsh in our judgment. Simply assuming the good intentions of the other person oftentimes has the ability to cool our fires. Another way to slow the speed of your rage is to think about your expectations of others. What are you expecting that you aren’t getting? Is the expectation reasonable? Can a compromise be made in meeting your expectation? Can you forgive the short comings of the person you have expectations from? Many individuals have difficulty forgiving others and would rather hold onto the anger out of revenge and spite or fear they may forget. Claudia Black, a psychologist says it best when she says “Forgiving is not forgetting, it is remembering and letting go”. Sometimes we just need to let go of our anger and make the choice to be happy. Holding onto to anger for the sake of revenge is a useless and destructive habit. “For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness”. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson Unexpressed anger can have destructive consequences not only emotionally and socially, but physically as well. According to a New York Times article, chronic anger can be more dangerous than smoking and obesity in shortening your life. Additionally, chronic anger can also rob you of the chance to be happy and simply enjoy life. “Anger will never disappear so long as thoughts of resentment are cherished in the mind. Anger will disappear just as soon as thoughts of resentment are forgotten.” ~Buddha Anger management strategies 1.) Learn to recognize your physiological reaction to anger (e.g. increase heart beat, sweaty palms, clenched fists, face feeling flushed, etc.) 2.) Take a time out and count to 10 backwards when you feel the anger building up. Breathe deeply 4-5 times in order to allow yourself time to come up with an appropriate reaction or plan to deal with the situation. Also keep in mind the hadith of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) who said: “The best of you are those who are slow to anger and swift to cool down.” (Tirmidhi) 3.) Learn to communicate your feelings and be assertive rather than aggressive. Express your feelings using “I” messages (e.g. “I am feeling upset right now because I feel what I’m saying is being taken out of context”). 4.) Learn constructive ways to channel your anger out (e.g. walk away from the situation and clear your head, exercise, meditate, write in a journal, speak into a tape recorder, talk to someone that is not related to the situation in order to get a clearer perspective, etc.). The Prophet (peace be upon him) has also advised us about the benefits of doing the following: Making Wudu (Ablution): “Anger comes from Satan and Satan was created of fire; and fire is extinguished only with water; so when one of you becomes angry, he should perform ablution.” (Sunan Abu Dawood) Changing Physical Position: “When one of you becomes angry while standing, he should sit down. If the anger leaves him, well and good; otherwise he should lie down.” (Sunan Abu Dawood) 5.) Accept that you can’t change the world or anyone else…you can only change your reaction. When you give up the idea that you can somehow change a person’s behavior or thoughts you become empowered and in control. You realize the only thing you have control over is your reaction to the person. You can choose to laugh about the situation, ignore it, make a joke out of it, or get angry. All those emotions are under your control and your choice. 6.) For chronic anger, you might want to look into an anger management program to learn strategies and coping skills in better managing your anger. Talking to a trained mental health professional is another recommended option. “You will not be punished for your anger; you will be punished by your anger”. Buddha This is why we are advised in Islam to fight our emotions and hold back our anger. Abu Hurayrah (may God be pleased with him) reported that a man said to the Prophet (peace be upon him), “Advise me.” He said, “Do not become angry.” The man repeated his request several times, and each time the Prophet (peace be upon him) told him, “Do not become angry.” (Al-Bukhari) Furthermore, The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “The strong man is not the one who can overpower others (in wrestling); rather, the strong man is the one who controls himself when he gets angry.” (Ahmad). And in another tradition he said, “The strongest man is the one who, when he gets angry and his face reddens and his hackles rise, is able to defeat his anger.” (Ahmad) These words of wisdom, as with all advice in the Quran and Sunnah of our Prophet (peace be upon him) are meant to help us live better lives. As the above quote by Buddha states, it’s not necessarily that God will punish us for being angry in the literal sense but that we get punished by our anger. Chronic anger eats away at us physically and spiritually. For this reason we are encouraged to control our anger. mentalhealth4muslims.com

Equipping our children for the journey to Jannah Every parent is responsible for their child. As such, it is the duty of every parent to train and equip their child with the necessary and relevant skills, knowledge and understanding that they will require throughout their life. Be it training in matters of hygiene, such as potty-training, teaching the child to bath himself, clean his teeth, etc., or in other basic skills, such as preparing a simple snack, packing the laundry away, cleaning a mess, etc. – every responsible parent ensures that their child receives practical training in order for the teaching to be effective and take root. In the very same way, when it comes to matters of Deen, it is absolutely vital for parents to give their children practical training, according to their age, understanding and capability, so that the child will be equipped to traverse the path to Jannah. Through practical training, the lesson and teaching will become firmly entrenched and embedded in the heart and mind of the child and will remain with him until his death. Consider the example of our beloved Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam). On one occasion, he was eating with his step-son, Sayyiduna ‘Umar bin Abi Salamah (radhiyallahu ‘anhuma). While eating, the young boy moved his hand around the platter, eating from different sides, despite the platter containing one type of food. Observing this, Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) addressed him, with love and gentleness, and taught him to recite “bismillah” before eating, to eat with the right hand and to eat from the side that was close to him. (Sunan Ibni Maajah #3267) In this way, while eating with him, Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) practically taught this young Sahaabi the etiquettes of eating and of sharing a platter with another person, ensuring that the lesson was absorbed and understood. We must ensure that we practically teach and train our children to uphold the teachings of Islam because while they may learn the teachings of Islam in madrasah or elsewhere, it is ONLY the parents, in the home, who are able to train the child to make these theoretical teachings a practical part of their life.They may learn the number of rakaats of each salaah in madrasah, as well as the various masnoon du‘aas and how to recite the Quraan, etc. but it is only the parents, at home, who can make the child practically implement these teachings in his life and become a ‘practising Muslim’. The more importance the parents will show to these aspects, the more importance the child will then show in practising them in his life. The month of Ramadhaan is fast approaching. Together with conducting ta’leem in the home and impressing on the children the great importance and significance of this month, we should encourage them, according to their age and ability, to commence fasting. Be it from 3pm until iftaar for smaller children, or a ‘half-fast’ from after lunch, or even a longer fast commencing after breakfast, it is some form of training that will create the mindset of fasting within the child and will prepare them to fulfil this responsibility later on in life. (When the child completes their ‘half-fast’, then perhaps some special treat can be given, highlighting to him that our happiness revolves around pleasing Allah Ta‘ala and fulfilling His commands.) The women of the Sahaabah (radhiyallahu ‘anhum) implemented this same practical training with their children. Hence, Sayyidah Rubayyi’ (radhiyallahu ‘anha) mentions that the women of the Ansaar would encourage their children to fast, and when the children would begin to ask for food, then to distract them, they would give them toys made from wool to play with. (Saheeh Bukhaari #1960) May Allah Ta‘ala assist us all to give our children the correct training and to equip them adequately for their journey to Jannah. UswatulMuslimah Jamiatul Ulama (KZN) Council of Muslim Theologians

Q. I am a mother of a new born and I am breastfeeding. My new born vomits milk that falls onto my clothes all the time. Can I perform Salaah with the vomited milk on my clothing? (Question published as received) A. There are two scenarios that apply to the vomit of an adult or a child: 1. Vomiting a mouthful -If one has vomited a mouthful, the vomit is regarded to be impure. For purposes of Salaah, if the total amount of vomit fallen onto the clothing is equivalent to a Dirham*, the vomit must be removed from the clothing before performing Salaah. It is not permissible to perform Salaah in that state. However, if the total amount of vomit is less than a Dirham*, one is not required to remove the vomit before performing Salaah, although it is preferable to do so. It is permissible to perform Salaah in that state. * Dirham refers to the Islamic silver coin that was approx. 2.75cm in diameter (Ahsanul Fataawa Vol. 1 pg. 89). It is equivalent to the size of the old 50 cent coin and is 2mm larger than the current R5 coin (South Africa). 2. Vomiting less than a mouthful - If one has vomited less than a mouthful, the vomit is not regarded to be impure. It is permissible for one to perform Salaah in that state, although, it is preferable for one to remove it before performing Salaah. The above ruling is the same whether the vomit is of milk, food or any other substance. In determining the size of a mouthful, the size of the adult’s or child’s mouth will be taken into consideration. A mouthful refers to one not being able to hold back the vomit in one’s mouth. (Maraaqil Falaah 1/155) And Allah Ta’ala Knows Best Mufti Ismaeel Bassa Confirmation: Mufti Ebrahim Desai (The answer hereby given is specifically based on the question asked and should be read together with the question asked. Islamic rulings on this Q&A newsletter are answered in accordance to the Hanafi Fiqh unless otherwise stated.) Fatwa Department Jamiatul Ulama (KZN) Council of Muslim Theologians

why hmm I've known of different opinions, some scholars can go under some conditions and others saying no, full stop..these are all together

With respect to women visiting the cemetery, there are three famous opinions of the Fuqaha (jurists) and scholars. The first opinion is that it is generally permissible for women to visit the graveyard. This allowance is on account of the tradition of the Prophet (SA) in which he said, ‘I used to prohibit you from visiting the graveyard, but now you can visit it. (Musnad ahmad). Those scholars who allow this, state that the above tradition includes the permission for women also (to visit the cemetery) as it is for men. The great jurist Shamsul A’imma Saraks; has preferred this. (Al Fatawa Hindiyah). The second opinion of some jurists is that it is not permissible (at all) for women to visit the cemetery, since the Prophet (SA) has cursed those women who visit the cemetery. As for the previous narration, these scholars state that the address is given only to men, not women. The third opinion of some jurists (which is generally accepted and practiced upon) is that, if by visiting the cemetery, women begin to cry, weep, wail and become uncontrollable, then it is haram for them to go to the cemetery, and it is on account of this behaviour, the Prophet (SA) cursed such women as mentioned in the above tradition. However, if the purpose of going to the cemetery is to take a lesson, and remember death and the hereafter, (and there is no possibility of crying and wailing), then it will be allowed for the older women, wearing their proper garb, to visit the cemetery, and not the young women. As mentioned by these scholars, the allowance for these women to visit the cemetery is based on the narration which states that Aisha (RA) used to visit the graves of the Prophet(SA), Abu Bakr and Umar (RA). (Hashiya Jamiul Masaaneed wa As Sunan). (Kitabul Fatawa vol.3 pg.228; Marghoobul Fatawa vol.3pg.317,317). Based on the above third opinion, if the women (as specified above ) wish to visit the cemetery, there is no fixed amount of days which must be passed in order for them to do so. However, due to the fact that women are soft by nature, if they go to the graveyard at a time that is close to the burial, then it is feared that they may cry loudly, and may become emotional, since the death of the person may still be fresh in their minds. Hence, it is best for them to allow a few days to past, when they have settled down a bit. And Allah knows best. Mufti Waseem Khan Source

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What is riya and can you please advise how to fix it? Question on Nov,20 2017 riyashow Question: What is riyāʾ and can you please advise how to fix it? Answer: Bismillahi Taʿālā Assalāmu ʿalaykum waraḥmatullāhī wabrakātuh, Riyāʾ means “show off”. It is an illness of the heart which remains hidden, unless accountability is made of it. Riyāʾ can creep into many different forms and can afflict even the righteous. Scholars have written numerous treatise on rectification of riyāʾ in one’s thoughts, actions and ʿibādāt. It has a tendency of eating away one’s good deeds like fire. Many actions and ʿibādāt are affected by insincerity leading to Riyāʾ where one starts to do actions to please one’s nafs instead of Allah. If one were to think hard then making our nafs’s pleasure a goal instead of pleasing Allah is nothing short of ascribing partners to Allah. Imām Tirmiẓī raḥimahullāh has pointed towards this while quoting the hadeeth, “Indeed riyāʾ is shirk” In our times, we seek quick fixes for everything. While there is no quick fix for a life long misplaced sincerity, one prescription given by our teachers for shunning riyāʾ and strengthening one’s ikhlās is through sincere “Istighfār“. For every action you do, follow it with sincere Istighfār from Allah for not having sincere intention in it. InshāʾAllāh, over time this will rectify the intention and diminish the riyāʾ. At the same time, keep close guidance from pious scholars and guides who can assist you in progress of your heart’s rectification. Finally, one should also be mindful that many individuals who realize the gravity of riyāʾ tend to abandon their ʿibādāt in fear of falling prey to riyāʾ. This retaliation itself is nothing less than the calamity of riyāʾ itself. The idea is to gain closeness of Allāh, inward and outward. Hence if avoidance of riyāʾ leads one to abandon the very act which was to take him closer to Allah, then shayṭān has fooled such an individual into abandoning good action. It is at this juncture, the above prescription is most useful. Carry on with the ʿibādah, while continuing to seek istighfār from Allāh. May Allah Taʿālā assist you in abundance and provide you freedom from riyāʾ like the pious aslaaf (predecessors), Ameen. And Allāh Taʿālā Knows best, Wassalamu ʿalaykum, Mufti Faisal al-Mahmudi سنن الترمذي – شركة مكتبة ومطبعة مصطفى البابي الحلبي (4/ 110) عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ أَنَّهُ قَالَ: «إِنَّ الرِّيَاءَ شِرْكٌ Source

Working out one’s zakaat date Q: When will zakaat be obligatory and how should one work out one's zakaat date? https://ecp.yusercontent.com/mail?url=http%3A%2F%2Fmuftionline.co.za%2Fsites%2Fdefault%2Ffiles%2Fpictures%2Fbismillah.jpg&t=1613931526&ymreqid=1e76d8aa-a6f0-66f7-1c0d-c20001017e00&sig=a6k5bO4cpjeOijwSBT_f5g--~D A: When a person acquires wealth (upon which zakaat is compulsory) which equals the nisaab and the wealth remains with him for an entire lunar year from the first day he acquires this wealth, zakaat will be fardh on that wealth. E.g. Zaid acquired R8 000 (which for example is the nisaab amount) on the first day of the lunar year (1st of Muharram 1434). This wealth remained with him for an entire lunar year. On the 1st of Muharram 1435, zakaat will be fardh upon the wealth. It should be noted that if the amount decreased during the course of the year e.g. R8 000 decreased to R1 000, but at the end of the zakaat year (1st of Muharram 1435), the amount returned to R8 000 or more, zakaat will be fardh. However, if during the year, all the money was spent and nothing remained, then one's zakaat year will no longer be calculated from the previous time when one had acquired the nisaab. Rather, one will count one lunar year from the next time one acquires the nisaab amount or more. (وشرط كمال النصاب) ولو سائمة (في طرفي الحول) في الابتداء للانعقاد وفي الانتهاء للوجوب (فلا يضر نقصانه بينهما) فلو هلك كله بطل الحول قال العلامة ابن عابدين - رحمه الله -: قوله (وشرط كمال النصاب إلخ) أي ولو حكما لما في البحر والنهر لو كان له غنم للتجارة تساوي نصابا فماتت قبل الحول فدبغ جلودها وتم الحول عليها كان عليه الزكاة إن بلغت نصابا ولو تخمر عصيره الذي للتجارة قبل الحول ثم صار خلا وتم الحول عليه وهو كذلك لا زكاة عليه لأن النصاب في الأول باق لبقاء الجلد لتقومه بخلافه في الثاني وروى ابن سماعة أنه عليه الزكاة في الثاني أيضا قوله (للانعقاد) أي انعقاد السبب أي تحققه بتملك النصاب ط قوله (للوجوب) أي لتحقق الوجوب عليه ط قوله (فلو هلك كله) أي في أثناء الحول بطل الحول حتى لو استفاد فيه غيره استأنف له حولا جديدا وتقدم حكم هلاكه بعد تمام الحول في زكاة الغنم قال في النهر ومنه أي من الهلاك ما لو جعل السائمة علوفة لأن زوال الوصف كزوال العين (رد المحتار 2/302) ولو هلك كله بطل الحول (حاشية الطحطاوي على مراقي الفلاح صـ 717) العبرة في الزكاة للحول القمري كذا في القنية (الفتاوى الهندية 1/175) وإذا كان النصاب كاملا في طرفي الحول فنقصانه فيما بين ذلك لا يسقط الزكاة كذا في الهداية (الفتاوى الهندية 1/175) (الزكاة واجبة على الحر العاقل البالغ المسلم إذا ملك نصابا ملكا تاما وحال عليه الحول) أما الوجوب فلقوله تعالى: وآتوا الزكاة ولقوله صلى الله عليه وسلم: أدوا زكاة أموالكم وعليه إجماع الأمة والمراد بالواجب الفرض لأنه لا شبهة فيه (الهداية 1/95) Answered by: Mufti Zakaria Makada Checked & Approved: Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

Merely possessing the knowledge of something is of little value if one does not apply it. This is an accepted principle. It is even worse if one becomes arrogant on account of this knowledge. The purpose of attending classes on the Seerah of Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ), for example, should be to adopt the inward and outward Sunnahs and to implement the lessons learned in our own lives. Sitting through lectures on the Shama’il and Hadith in general must result in the application of Sunnahs to ourselves. If this is not the case, we need to ask ourselves, what went wrong? How is it that I’ve spent so much time pursuing sacred knowledge yet I haven’t connected the dots to establish the relationship between knowledge and action? This is precisely why our pious elders emphasized that a seeker of knowledge must always remain concerned about the acceptance of one’s knowledge (‘ilm) of the Deen. In other words, if the sacred knowledge one pursued receives acceptance from Allah, it was worth pursuing it and acting upon it. If, on the other hand, Allah does not grant it acceptance in His court then seeking it was an undertaking in vain. The scholars of the heart (ahl al-tasawwuf) have laid out five steps to achieve Divine Acceptance (qubuliyyah) in one’s knowledge which are as follows: STEP 1: Acquire knowledge Seeking knowledge of the Deen is an obligation of varying degrees upon every believing person. This is the first step and an essential one. Without recognizing the need for increasing one’s knowledge it is impossible to improve our condition, as individuals and as a community. To underscore the importance of seeking increase in knowledge, here is a Qur’anic fact: Did you know that the ONLY thing Allah asked His Messenger (ﷺ) to seek increase in within the entire Qur’an is knowledge? Allah says in the Qur’an as a command directed at the Prophet (ﷺ): Given the significance of seeking increase in one’s knowledge, it only makes sense that acquiring sacred knowledge is the first step towards achieving Divine Acceptance because without knowing what brings us closer to our Creator there is no way forward. STEP 2: Act upon the knowledge gained Imam Darimi narrates in his Sunan that Sayyiduna ‘Umar ibn al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) asked Ka’b (al-Ahbar), who had knowledge of the previous scriptures, “Who are the people of knowledge [according to you]?” Ka’b rahimahullah answered “those who act upon their knowledge”. In other words, the attribution of knowledge towards the people of knowledge is due to their acting upon it. Hence, the one who knows of the clear prohibitions of the Shari’ah but does not refrain from them by continuously and openly engaging in prohibited matters is not really from the people of knowledge, no matter how many honorific titles are assigned to him and how many degrees or ijazahs he has. STEP 3: Act upon knowledge with sincerity (ikhlas) Because the acceptance of all actions hinges upon intention, without sincerity in one’s intentions (i.e. acting purely for the pleasure of Allah) there can be no hope for reward. This sincerity is achievable through one simple method that our teachers advise of: Perform good acts and tell no one. Give charity anonymously, for example. Make it a matter strictly between you and Allah. DON’T TELL A SOUL. Or, for example, pray a few rak’ahs of supererogatory prayers when no one is around so that no one except Allah knows about it. STEP 4: Sincerity in one’s actions must be adherent to the Sunnah No matter the level of sincerity in one’s actions, if it opposes a Sunnah command, it is of no value. For example, one prays a few rak’ahs completely out of sight from his acquaintances and even his own family, completely alone in a room that no one has access to, but he performs them at sunrise or sunset. Even though there is little doubt about this person’s sincere intentions, because his actions go against the Prophetic command to abstain from prayer at these times, the disregard for the Sunnah results in no benefit for him. Our actions, based on the knowledge we’ve gained, should not conflict with the Sunnah even if they are done with sincere intentions. Remember, actions which are in conformity with the Sunnah are the purest and the most beloved to Allah. STEP 5: After acting upon knowledge with sincere intentions, worry about its acceptance! Allah praised the Sahabah (may Allah be pleased with them) in the Qur’an for their charity by stating: The Sahabah gave what they gave in the path of Allah but even after this clearly virtuous act their hearts remained fearful. What was their fear? They were worried about the acceptance of their sadaqah by Allah. Hence, a believer acquires requisite knowledge, acts upon it with ikhlas and ensures it is in line with the Sunnah but always remains concerned about its acceptance in the court of Allah. He continues to supplicate to Allah beseeching Him to accept his knowledge-seeking, his good actions and his refraining from what is prohibited. May Allah grant us all tawfiq. Amin. Source

Treatment of Cataract from the Quran One of the Swiss pharmaceutical companies has started producing a new medicine called “Medicine of Quran” which allows the treatment of cataract without surgery. As the newspaper Ar-Raya, published in Qatar writes, “this drug which was synthesised by an Egyptian doctor Abdul Basit Muhammad from the secretions of human sweat glands and has an effectiveness of 99 per cent with absolutely no side effects, was registered in Europe and the United States. It is also reported that one of the Swiss companies produces the new drug in the form of liquid and eye drops . The source of inspiration is Surah(chapter) Yusuf. Dr Abdul Basit Muhammad emphasised that he obtained his inspiration from Surah Yusuf and said: “ Once in the morning, I was reading Surah(chapter) Yusuf. My attention lingered over the 84th and successive ayats (verses). “Go with this shirt of mine, and cast it over the face of my father, he will become clear-sighted, and bring to me all your family” (Qur’an 12:93) They tell that Prophet Yakub who was mourning his son Yusuf (peace be upon them) in sadness and grief got his eyes turned white and later when people cast over the sorrowful father’s face, the shirt of his son Yusuf, vision returned to him and he was able to see again.Here I started pondering. What could be there in the shirt of Yusuf? Finally I arrived at the decision that nothing except sweat could be on it. I concentrated my thoughts over the sweat and its composition. Then I proceeded to the laboratory for research. I carried out a series of experiments on rabbits. The results turned out to be positive. Later I performed treatment on 250 patients by administering the drug twice a day for two weeks. Finally I achieved 99 per cent success and said to myself: “ This is the miracle of the Quran” Dr Abdul Basit Muhammad presented the results of his research to appropriate institutions in Europe and the United States dealing with patenting of new discoveries for consideration. After tests and research were performed, he finalised a contract with a Swiss company on the production of the medicine on the condition that the package should clearly mention-“Medicine of Quran.” In the words of the Egyptian scientist, the company accepted his condition and started producing the new drug. (Courtesy-Ar-Raya, Qatar) Allah Ta’ala says in the Qur’an-e-Kareem: We send down from the Qur’an that which is a healing and mercy to those who believe)(QURAAN 17:82) Protection against blindness: Recite three times morning and evening: “Subhaanallaahil- azeemi wa bihamdihi wala hauwla wala quwwata illa billaah” : “Pure and sublime is Allah. The Mighty and Praise belongs only to Him. There is no Power to save from sins, nor strength to accomplish good but with the Help of Allah.” (From:”Morning & Evening Duaas”) Strengthening the eye-sight(from Qur’an): Recite this verse three times after every salaah(prayer) for strengthening of eye-sight: “Laqad kunta fie ghaflatim min haadha fakashafna anka ghitaa-aka fabasurakal hadeed”: “(It will be said) Thou wast heedless of this, now We have removed thy veil, And sharp is thy sight this day !” (From: “Remedies from the Holy Qur’an.”) Courtesy: www.everymuslim.co.za

Meraj Mohiuddin’s “Revelation: The Story of Muhammad ﷺ”: A Critical Review JULY 10, 2019 By Bilal Ali Ansari In the name of Allah, Most Merciful and Compassionate. Despite its relatively recent publication, Dr. Meraj Mohiuddin’s Revelation: The Story of Muhammad (Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him) has quickly become one of the more popular, publicized, and widely-distributed additions to the growing corpus of English literature on the prophetic biography (sīrah). Boasting an aesthetically-pleasing, simple, and modern design, Revelationenjoys a long list of endorsements by well-recognized Muslim personalities in the West and a foreword by the American Muslim academic Dr. Sherman Jackson. The author, a physician by training, has taken great pains to design a book that is rich in illustrations to complement a condensed chronicle of the Messenger of Allah’s life (may Allah bless him and grant him peace). Mohiuddin includes a wealth of graphics: maps, family trees, and timelines that help visualize complex lineages and familial relationships, track the movements of armies, and contextualize significant events in time. Deceptively large in size, the book’s historical material is in fact quite concise, providing first-time readers of the sīrah a summarized version of the contents of, for the most part, Martin Ling’s Muhammad: His Life Based on the Earliest Sourcesand Ṣafī al-Raḥmān al-Mubārakpūrī’s The Sealed Nectar: Biography of the Noble Prophet(al-Raḥīq al-Makhtūm). Readers will be able to immediately appreciate the overall quality of the printing: the heavy paper, strong binding, professional typesetting, minimalist design, etc… Unlike some sīrahbooks available in the market, which – despite some excellent content – are commonly discredited due to their poor grammatical constructions, imprecise translations, archaic prose, sophomoric transliteration, or simply the use of flimsy paper that allows text to bleed through to the other side, Revelationensures that no reader will superficially dismiss it on the basis of appearance alone. Once the curious reader opens the textbook to grade it on the basis of its actual substance, however, some serious limitations of the work begin to emerge. The graphics, timelines, glossaries, and quality printing become quickly and regrettably obscured by a paucity of sources, a careless narrative, an excessive poetic license, and a general reductionistic historical revisionism, amongst a laundry list of other issues. Of course, there is little reason to doubt the noble and sincere intentions of the author, who despite admitted academic limitations, goes to great pains to present readers with a biography that reflects his appreciation of the Prophet (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) while also appearing to be a critical and reflective narrative. Our intention in writing this review is not to place doubt on the author’s aims or motives. It is simply an attempt to bring to light some of the book’s shortcomings, be they obvious or subtle, so that readers may be equipped to read it with a critical eye. Our hope is that despite the work’s historical and methodological failings, readers will learn to appreciate its limitations while still taking advantage of the book’s noteworthy contributions, and that the author will benefit from the suggestions of this review – as harsh or extensive as they may seem – in producing future editions. Method of Critique In this critique, we attempt to address some of the key issues of methodology and sources in the work under separate headings and with only a few examples from the text for each. Should it be requested or required, a future, more exhaustive corrigendum may be provided with a more detailed, systematic inventory of errors arranged in order of their appearance in the book. For the time being, we suffice with four main headings – poverty of sources, reductionist historical revisionism and cultural presentism, factual inaccuracies, and poetic license. We have not intended, by any means, to exhaustively list the book’s failings. We have also chosen not to focus on typographical or spelling errors, transliteration issues, or other minor points in this review. However, in some instances, when it is useful for the reader to address smaller matters, we have done so. A case in point is the author’s choice to exclude Arabic text in the book so that the reader “will not have to treat it with ceremonial care”, despite the cover of the book being adorned with a beautiful calligraphic print of the Prophet Muḥammad’s name (may Allah bless him and grant him peace), which even if not a verse of the Qurʾān, demands a certain degree of veneration and ceremonial care. Due to this ill-equipped reviewer’s own academic limitations and owing to the urgency with which this review was prepared, I am certainly under no illusion that my critique has sufficiently or comprehensively addressed the book’s flaws, nor that every particular assessment is accurate. It is my sincere hope that any mistakes found in this review will be rectified in the future, with help from the reader, for the general benefit. FULL ARTICLE HERE

Seeratul Mustafa new abridged 1 volume & original 3 volumes (Links to an external site.) The Sealed Nectar Muhammad The Ideal Prophet by Abul Hasan Ali Nadvi (Links to an external site.) Seerah of The Final Messenger by Mufti Muhammad Shafi The Battles of Prophet Muhammad by Ibn Kathir When The Moon Split

When you post the du'as its an opportunity for us to read it as a Du'a and thats how I notice errors. Its better to point out on the topic so anyone copying them will be informed. Allah ta'ala accept all efforts!

Assalaamu 'laykum warahmatullah! Jazaakillahu khayran once more for the excellent contribution Can you pls check the following word? Transliteration says, "wa min da’watith-thubuur" so is it a Shhen on a thaa? وَمِنْ دَعْوَةِ الشُّبُوْرِ،

Summarized by Samah Syed from the ‘Gateways of Relief and Assistance’ webinar by Shaykh Tameem Ahmadi. It is in the nature of this worldly life that it will be filled with trials and tribulations for every individual, old or young, rich or poor. Allah Most High states in the Qur’an: “And whatever of misfortune befalls you, it is because of what your hands have earned” (Qur’an, 42:30) Thus, we should understand that any calamity that befalls us is often a consequence of our wrongdoings and ultimately this is a calling for us from Allah Most High to turn back to Him. Although we must turn to Allah in both good times and bad, it is especially natural for the human in his desperate and broken state to wholly and completely turn to His Lord in need. Here are five ways through which we can attain nearness to our Lord and thereby attain ultimate peace of heart in times of trial and tribulation: #1 Du’a Allah Most High says in the Qur’an: “And your Lord says: ‘Call on me; I will answer your prayer’ (Quran, 40:60)” Du’a is a direct link to our Creator and is an act of worship that can be done at anytime and anywhere. It is a means by which we can pour our hearts out and rest assured that our affairs will be taken care of by the King of kings. It is stated in a hadith that when Allah Most High sees the hands of the slave lifted up to him He feels shame that He should leave that person’s hands unfilled (Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi). We should therefore keep making du’a with a firm conviction that Allah Most High will most definitely answer it. We must never be despondent and complain that Allah is not answering our du’as. When we ask Him, either Allah gives us exactly what we want, or He doesn’t and instead stores something better for us in the hereafter or He removes some calamity of this life by means of that du’a. Thus, making du’a is a “win-win-win” situation. #2 Reciting Qur’an In the Qur’an there is an invitation of Allah, therefore we should accept the invitation, the way a guest honors the invitation given to him by his host. Abundant recitation of the blessed Book of Allah brings about nur (light) and barakah (blessings) within a person and allows one to attain peace of heart and mind. For every letter we recite, Allah Most High grants us ten hasanat (rewards). The Qur’an is said to be the rope of Allah, and just as a rope is used to pull a fallen individual out of a dark well, the Qur’an is a means of pulling us out from the darkness of all our worries and difficulties. #3 Dhikr Allah Most High says in the Qur’an: “Those who believe, and whose hearts find rest in the remembrance of Allah, Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest (Qur’an, 13:28).” Allah Most High states that He is with us whenever we remember Him. Thus, what better method of dealing with our sorrows and anxieties than being in the company of our Creator? When we engage in abundant dhikr (remembrance), depression and worry is taken away from the heart and happiness is brought into the heart. We drive away Satan and attain Allah’s pleasure. Our bodies and hearts are strengthened and a nur (light) develops in our hearts and faces. Dependent upon how much dhikr we make, we develop a proximity or closeness to Allah and a mahabbah or love for Allah also forms in our hearts. Dhikr can take many forms, the most common of which are tasbih (SubhanAllah), tahlil (La ilaha il Allah), tahmid (Alhamdullilah), takbir (Allahu Akbar) and istighfar (Astaghfirullah). It is stated in a hadith that just as iron rusts, so too do our hearts and therefore just as iron needs polish, the polish for our rusted hearts is abundant dhikr. Thus we should make use of these “polishes” so that our hearts are constantly renewed and refreshed. #4 Salah Allah Most High says in the Qur’an: “And seek help in patience and As-Salat (Qur’an, 2:45).” Salah or prayer is our daily connection with Allah and has been referred to as the mi’raj or ascension of the believer. Whenever Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) had any trouble or concern he would quickly resort to salah to gain comfort and clarity. Our daily prayers are our links to Allah and it is in salah where we are the closest to Him. Our prayers (salahs) attract rizq (provisions) and serve as protection for our wealth and material well-being. #5 Salutations upon the Prophet (ﷺ) Allah Most High says in the Qur’an: “Allah and His angels send blessings on the Prophet. Oh you who believe! Send blessings on him, and salute him with all respect (Qur’an, 33:56).” Ubayy ibn Ka’b (may Allah be pleased with him) once came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and asked him how much of his du’a should include salutations upon the Prophet (ﷺ). The Prophet (ﷺ) told him he could include as much as he pleased and if he did more then it would be better for him. Ubayy ibn Kaab (may Allah be pleased with him) then asked him about dedicating a quarter of his du’a to salawat (salutations upon the Prophetﷺ). Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) gave him the same reply again. He then asked him about half and then two-thirds until he finally asked if he should make his entire du’a dedicated to sending salawat. Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) told him if he did this then all his worries would be taken care of and all of his sins would be forgiven (Ahmad, Tirmidhi). Thus, we should make it a habit to send abundant salutations on Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) every day, especially on Fridays. By doing so we would have opened yet another gateway of bringing tranquility and contentment to our hearts. Source

2 - Safar Safar - Superstitions

1- Muharram Muharram & Aashura Muharram, Karbalah & Aashura Additional spending on the day of Aashura Muharram - Reflect, Resolve and Reclaim!

Taken from "Etiquettes of Social Life" by Shaykh Ashraf Ali Thanvi (rahimahullah) PDF

True Appreciation of Rajab By Shaykhul-Hadīth, Hadrat Mawlānā Muhammad Saleem Dhorat hafizahullāh With the advent of Rajab, the seventh month of the Islamic calendar, Muslims remember the great miracle of the Beloved Nabī of Allāh ta‘ālā, the Mi‘rāj, which is commonly believed to have taken place in this month. During this miracle, Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam travelled with his body and soul from Makkah Mukarramah to Baytul-Maqdis, and from there to the seven heavens and beyond and returned all in a split second. The first part of the journey, from Makkah Mukarramah to Al-Masjidul-Aqsā, is called the Isrā and is mentioned in the Glorious Qur’ān. The second part of the journey, from Al-Masjidul-Aqsā to the heavens and beyond, is known as the Mi‘rāj. The great Mufassir ‘Allāmah Ibn Kathīr rahimahullāh has enumerated twenty-five Sahābah radhiyallāhu ‘anhum who have narrated this second part of the journey from Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam. With regards to Mi‘rāj and the month of Rajab, let us keep the following points in mind: • Auspicious nights such as Laylatul-Qadr, Laylatul-Barā’ah and Laylatul-Jumu‘ah are full of virtue and blessing, but the difference between them and the night of Mi‘rāj is that this night was prominent in blessings only on the particular night when Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam made this blessed journey. The blessedness and prominence does not return every year. Therefore, to make special arrangements of any sort or to engage in ‘ibādah during this night, assuming it to be blessed, is baseless. There is no record of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam or the Sahābah radhiyallāhu ‘anhum celebrating the night of Mi‘rāj. • This great miracle is commonly believed to have taken place on the 27th night of the Islamic month of Rajab. However, the ‘Ulamā hold differing opinions about the exact date. Hāfiz Ibn Hajar Al-‘Asqalānī rahimahullāh, the commentator of Sahīhul-Bukhārī, has quoted more than ten different opinions for the possible date of Mi‘rāj. If this night was meant to be observed and spent in ‘ibādah, there would have been no difference amongst the Sahābah radhiyallāhu ‘anhum, for their ‘ibādah would have clearly defined the time of occurrence. • The incident of Mi‘rāj is truly an extraordinary event and a blessing not bestowed upon any other prophet, angel or other creation of Allāh ta‘ālā, neither before nor after. The correct way of truly celebrating and appreciating this great event is to remember the very precious gift that Allāh ta‘ālā sent for us on that night i.e. salāh. The performance of the five daily salāh is the Mi‘rāj for the believers, as through ṣalāh they receive the honour of conversing with Allāh ta‘ālā. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said: Allāh ta‘ālā says in a Al-Hadīthul-Qudsī: By understanding the position of salāh in Islām, one can conclude that only that person who values the gift of Mi‘rāj can truly claim to have understood Mi‘rāj. When the month of Rajab would arrive, Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam used to make the following du‘ā: Allāhumma barik lana fī rajabin wa sha'bān, wa balighnā Ramadān. O Allāh! Grant us barakah in the months of Rajab and Sha‘bān and make us reach the month of Ramadān. (Al-Mu‘jamul-Awsat) Therefore, it is desirable to recite this du‘ā on the advent of Rajab. Upon the commencement of Rajab, everyone should focus their attention on making preparations for the blessed month of Ramadān. This preparation is a spiritual one and entails fulfilling one’s duties to Allāh ta‘ālā, especially in areas where one is lacking. Preparing for Ramadān from the month of Rajab is just like getting into a car and putting it in first gear. Begin to observe the compulsory and obligatory acts from now so that by the time Ramadān sets in, you are in fifth gear practising many optional acts of worship as well. May Allāh ta‘ālā give us the tawfīq to practise upon His entire Dīn according to the teachings of our Beloved Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam, and may He enable us to start making preparations for the month of Ramadān from now. Āmīn. Extracted from 'Inspirations' (Part 1) © Islāmic Da'wah Academy

The Basis and Objective of Unity Hazrat Moulana Ashraf Ali Thanwi (rahmatullahi ‘alaih) once mentioned: Allah Ta‘ala says in the Qur’aan Majeed: وَ اعۡتَصِمُوۡا بِحَبۡلِ اللّٰهِ جَمِیۡعًا وَّلاَ تَفَرَّقُوۡا Hold firmly to the rope of Allah all together and do not be divided. (Surah Aal-e-Imraan v. 103) The benefit of unity mentioned in this verse will not be acquired by merely bringing people together. Rather, the benefit of unity will be acquired through bringing people together and uniting them upon the rope of Allah (i.e. uniting them upon practising true deen). Hence, it is a futile exercise to try and bring people together merely for the sake of unity (when their deeni views and objectives are poles apart). Instead, the purpose of unity is to unite people upon the truth, and this is what is being referred to by “Hold firmly to the rope of Allah all together and do not be divided” mentioned in this verse of the Qur’aan Majeed. In other words, the first step towards achieving unity is to determine which group is upon haq (the truth) and which group is upon baatil (falsehood). (Thereafter, both groups should be dealt with correctly.) The group that is upon baatil should be invited towards the haq, and the group that is upon haq should not be criticized or condemned in any way. (When this is the approach adopted, then unity will be achieved.) Hence, we understand that this verse refers to a specific type of unity and not general unity by merely bringing people together without the correct deeni objective being achieved, merely for the sake of unity. (Malfoozaat Hakeemul Ummat 14/56)

already moved form "Madhabs" to fiqh

Romance in a Marriage Nabi sallallaahu ‘alayhi wasallam said, “The best of you is the one who is best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives.” [Ibn Majah] Romance is very much a part of our Deen. Our Nabi sallallaahu ‘alayhi wasallam was extremely loving and romantic as seen in Hadith. ‘A’isha RA said the Prophet took her along with him on one of his journeys. The Prophet instructed his Companions to go on ahead. After they had proceeded some distance, the Prophet asked ‘A’isha if she would like to race him. ‘A’isha gladly accepted and won the race. Years had passed and ‘A’isah again accompanied Prophet Muhammad on a journey. He asked again if she should like to race. Reminding her husband of the race that she once won, she readily accepted his offer. They raced but this time ‘A’isha lost. According to ‘A’isha, this was due to the weight she had gained since the first race. Afterwards, the Prophet, smiling, said: “This is in return for that race.” Aisha RA said that Nabi sallallaahu 'alayhiw asallam used to put his mouth on the place she had drunk from and he would lay his head on her lap and recite the Qur'an even when she was menstruating. He called her by a special name (Humayraa). Many cultural practices extinguish romance i.e. when living with extended family where modesty has to be maintained. However couples can still have excitement by going out, going away, etc. and women can dress in revealing clothes to be visually appealing and attractive in private. The beginning of the relationship is maintained by romantic attraction which ends so one needs to build the relationship on a solid foundation of respect, honesty, loyalty, etc. After the end of this period spouses need to figure out their values and how to live by them. Public display of affection The Prophet sallallaahu ‘alayhi wasallam had fun with his wives however it was not publicly done. Intimacy It is the right on each other to have full and complete fulfilment. Historically and in conservative societies women having this expectation are looked down on. This is not right as women can be very sensual and should be sensual towards their husbands. The husbands are asked to lower their gaze and guard their modesty so women should offer what they desire as they are human and avoiding temptations. This is why there is marriage. Behind closed doors very little is off limit between husband and wife. Few exceptions include when in menstruation/post-natal bleeding and impermissible acts of intimacy. There is a need to talk to professionals about abuse, past trauma, illness, etc. as they can interfere emotionally and physically with intimacy with the spouse Intimacy should not be denied without a valid reason “If a husband calls his wife to his bed and she refuses and causes him to sleep in anger, the angels will curse her till morning.” (Bukhari) “When a man calls his wife for his need, then let her come, even if she is at the oven.” (Tirmidhi)

The Nikah & Waleemah · Nikkah in a Masjid is Sunnah – a Nikah should be publicized so there are no doubts when the couple are seen together. It should not be a secret Nikah. The Prophet sallallaahu ‘alayhi wasallama said, “Announce the marriage.” Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Ibn Ḥibbān 4066 · · Two witnesses necessary · Mehr - is an agreed amount given by the groom to the bride. Woman can forgo it however if agreed than groom has to give it or he will be accountable for it. To avoid conflict the Mahr should be discussed and agreed upon before the Nikah ceremony and bargaining should be avoided. It should not be so high that the groom cannot afford it and not so little that it dishonours the bride. The best Mahr is affordable and easy. The Sunnah is in moderation · Other words used in the Qur’an doe Mahr: ‘attiyah, nihla, hiba · Right of the wife from her husband - Mahr is the right of the wife. It is a gift by which he honours his wife and a means of expressing his seriousness and responsibility as he enters the Nikah. Allah ta’ala says in the Qur’an, And give the women (on marriage) their dower as a free gift; but if they, of their own good pleasure, remit any part of it to you, Take it and enjoy it with right good cheer [Surah Nisaa: 4] So he should give it willingly and she can forgo it however she cannot be forced to forgo it · Due immediately after nikkah · Amount: Minimum: 10 dirhams-30.618 gr Silver Mehr Fatimi: 1,530 gr Silver – what Ali RA gave to Faatimah RA Mehr Mithl – the amount given to a woman on the bride’s paternal side. Have to consider similarity in age, beauty, virginity, locality, time and wealth Moderation · Mu’ajjal – due immediately after Nikah and Muajjal – delayed. It is a debt to the wife if not pai · Wakeel from the girl’s family Father, brother, uncle – a representative who provides her consent for the groom she has chosen Note: consent of girl necessary. There cannot be a marriage without consent Hadith: Aisha RA reported: I said, “O Messenger of Allah, should women be asked for their consent before marriage?” The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Yes.” I said, “Indeed, sometimes a virgin is too shy to speak when asked.” The Prophet said, “Her silence is her consent.” [Bukhari Muslim] · Khutbah Surah Al Imran: 102 O you who believe! Observe your duty to Allah with right observance, and die not save as those who have surrendered (unto Him) Surah Al Nisa: 1 O mankind! Have fear of your Rabb, the One who created you from a single soul, from that soul He created its mate, and through them He spread countless men and women. Fear Allah, the One in whose name you demand your rights from one another and the ties of relationship; surely Allah is watching you very closely. Surah Al Ahzab: 70-71 O believers! Fear Allah and always say the right thing; He will bless your deeds for you, and forgive your sins. And whoever obeys Allah and His Messenger, has truly achieved a great triumph. *Explanations of these verses from Qur’an class at the end of the document · Acceptance from both sides – involves “Ijaab” (offer) and “Qubool” (acceptance) Note: Both Ijaab and Qubool have to be in an audible manner. Woman cannot be forced. A representative of the bride and two witnesses will ask the bride for her permission. This will be relayed to the Imam during the ceremony. The Imam will ask the groom if he accepts the bride in his Nikah. Once he says “yes, I accept”, the Nikah is complete *It is Mustahab to distribute dates Feeding people - there is no rule in Islam that girl side have to feed people. There should be no pomp and show. There should be no extravagance in the whole procedure or anything Haraam like music, free mixing, etc. Sunnah ways is Simplicity Nabi sallallaahu ‘alayhi wasallam said, “The most blessed marriage (nikah) is the one with the least expenses.” Fatimah RA was sent walking to the house of Ali RA accompanied by Umm Ayman RA after a simple Nikah without any pomp and show Waleemah The Waleemah is Sunnah as a sign of gratitude and pleasure therefore the correct Niyyah should be made of following the Sunnah, inviting and feeding people, making them happy, etc. Correct Niyyah should also be made when inviting people as people often invite others because they feel they have to. There should be no ostentation or in competition with others which is contagious and can lead others to emulate. Waleemah can take place after Khalwah or consummation The best Nikah and Waleemah is that which is simple and affordable without unnecessary delays and the Waleemah is the duty of the husband. The more pomp, show, extravagance, etc. the more the stress, disagreements and arguments. People take out loans in order to cover the costs which makes it even more burdensome. The most blessed marriage is the one which is the least burdensome. The principles of Deen should be kept at all times during the arrangements of the Nikah and Waleemah. A compromise can be made for some customs where parents and other close relatives could be very hurt however there is no compromise of that which is forbidden in the Shari’ah. The pandemic situation shows that extravagance can be avoided and simple Nikahs and Waleemahs can be done. Therefore, even after the pandemic we need to go back to the Sunnah. Starting this journey on the right foot with the right Niyyah and the stamp of Sunnah will bring Barakah in the marriage.

Next stage before agreement is reached After finding a compatible prospective spouse the next steps to take the process forward are; · Research - regarding the family, friend circle, colleagues, etc. through someone trustworthy because some people may have some ulterior motive and not provide correct information. The aim is to find out what reputation the prospective spouse has among people This stage is important and can take time. If found to be incompatible thenit is better not to move forward to the next stage · Exchange bios – if parents cannot be approached directly, tell siblings, aunt/uncle or another elder and thereafter exchange bios. Keep it simple and mention if status of passport/visa is a concern · Ask a Mehram to speak with the person · Arrange a family meeting Seeing each other – is permissible however within limits with mahram present, not alone in a room or going out together to “get to know each other” Questions can be asked. One can ask what one is comfortable with. The purpose is to gauge through the discussion if the same goals are being shared and/or how much Deen orientated the person is. As mentioned before, it is extremely important to keep in mind the principles of Deen while meeting and having the discussions. · Make Istikharah – this is a very important part of the process. Making Istikharah and trusting in Allah ta’ala should lead to contentment of the heart so that if things did not go smoothly or did not work out then one knows it is Khayr from Allah ta’ala. Istikharah Du’a O Allah! I seek goodness from Your Knowledge and with Your Power (and Might) I seek strength, and I ask from You Your Great Blessings, because You have the Power and I do not have the power. You Know everything and I do not know, and You have knowledge of the unseen. Oh Allah! If in Your Knowledge this action ------------ (which I intend to do) is better for my religion and faith, for my life and end [death], for here [in this world] and the hereafter then make it destined for me and make it easy for me and then add blessings in it, for me. O Allah! In Your Knowledge if this action ………is bad for me, bad for my religion and faith, for my life and end [death], for here [in this world] and the hereafter then turn it away from me and turn me away from it and whatever is better for me, ordain [destine] that for me and then make me satisfied with it. A shorter version which can be done at any time, and as often as one wants (though there are recommended numbers) is the following: اللَّهُمَّ خِرْ لِيْ وَاخْتَرْ لِي Allaahumma khirlee wakhtarlee O Allah grant me a choice and choose for me Accept parents and elders’ guidance as they have your best interest at heart Make decision soon and accept outcome · Once proposal accepted, do not delay Nikah and waste time in long engagements (which are not part of Islam). Nikah should be public in a masjid, not secret